nuffnang ads

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

Friday, March 30, 2012

gundah malas nak endah


read this status on Fb...and finally feels a bit relieve...
i don't know if i am strong enough to face this...but will make sure that at least i look strong enough for everyone insyaAllah....

When someone pray, Allah will answers:
1) Yes
2) Yes but not now
3) I have a better plan for youNote: There's never 'no'. Keep praying. 


- E N D -

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

takde keje sangat dah...

i blame emir...since he did this and recommend me to do this too...tak pasal pasal terjebak..-___-'so...obviously it's not true at all..lately...geoff really had influenced me..especially when it comes about believing stuffs and finding a better solution...so..taadaaa...i did it seven times just to see how different the results could be...anyone...this is one of the apps in facebook where it will somehow bajet bajet predict your future and all that...here come my result..









pfftttt...scary ha? arrange marriage in Malaysia...and only one hit the love based marriage..and getting married in Launceston..???(serious tak boley blah...) 

so...tahyul seme ni...kalau geoff tahu ni...mahu dia luku kepala haku...dia suruh buat strategy design...ni buat hape ni ha???!!!

-E N D

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

i call it lovey dovey thingy

so....let's talk about this lovey dovey thingy...i must be crazy because right now i am suppose to be hell panic about all the subjects at school...and definly, not blogging at this critical time..

but...i feel the urge of writing this entry..too many incident to handle in one time..so..read and think..sometimes it just too hard to spit the words out...yeah..

loads of thing happened lately...all the mix feeling...me..and people around me...you know who you are...keeping a secret..or knowing a story which not many people knew really gives me hard times...

let's make it clear...for everyone...and for myself...

first...let's clarify about feelings thingy.....-___-' (speaks like a pro..ha!)

sometimes, we just confuse and not sure about our own feelings...that happen all the time..like seriously..all the time...you aim for someone...you got the chance to get closer to the person that you're aiming for...and buufff!! all you can see now are the beautiful side of her/him?

or...

surprisingly...you have no feelings at all...?? all the excitement...the eagerness...gone...just like that..once the 'subject' you aimed for is almost yours...you realize that you are just happy chasing him/her...

like and love are two different things...want to have..and want to love..or need someone...those are all different things... ska.... you tweeted about this last few days??weeks? can't remember...

you are thirsty.you need a water.

it's a different thing when i say..

i like coffee, and i can't stop drinking it, it makes me happy although my body can't stand caffeine at all. (<---ni namanya bodoh!)

and so on...

being all pushy all the time... believing something that almost impossible to happen would happen is stupid...

making someone comfortable being with you doesn't guarantee that s/he loves you just the way you loved them...seriously...

it is true that..if you want something..work for it...make it happen..but in this lovey dovey thingy...it wont happen...unless Allah said so...that s/he 's gonna be yours no matter what...

having someone who loves your strength and weakness is awesome...but it is definly unfair when you doesn't love her/him back at all... so...one of the party should stop...the one who loves should stop loving..because it ain't gonna work..seriously! and the one who don't bother to love should do something to stop this lovey dovey thingy...before it become critical and no turning back at all!

been there.done that.

i've been in both shoes...weird enough because if you really know me, i am the type of person who hardly fall for someone..but i did fall for someone...long time ago...

and the wrong thing about relationship is when you get confuse about being bestie and boyfriend and girlfriend thingy...

i used to fall for my bestie before.while i am actually dating someone....yep..i know how it sounds like..WRONG!!!!we had that mutual feelings and he burst it out first... so...tadaaaa....we're screwed...the feeling is now gone...! we discuss about it like a pro...and we found that...it is just wrong..we are besties...can never be more than that...we might seems good together...but seems doesn't mean must....

never get confuse with your own feelings...NEVER...!!!

okay..i am the type who had plenty of besties...bunch of close friends...trustworthy friends..friends that i only call to ask for help...friend that i will only seek for fun...and so the list goes...but one thing that im sure is that..i always appreciate friends...friend for me is the person who will laugh at you before s/he help you...understand you when you needed a space..and a person who you won't feel bore with...a person who will stand up with you when you're to weak to stand alone by yourself...

so...what i see in relationship..is more likely about taking control...get jealous...baby talking...talking sweet stuff...romantic surprise...check on each other...and few other things that i think ridiculous and won't last long...(now, it makes sense why i have loads of gay friends huh?)

the harder you try to get closer to the person you think you're in love with...you are actually pulling it farther..trust me...although this theory cannot be applied to all women/girls...but it do apply in current situation(s)...and i don't know how men reacts towards this kind of situation..but..from my observation...men react almost the same like women..some emotionally affected..some rationally just take it easy...

so, when you are sure that the relationship won't work...do reject it politely...never gives hopes...hopes will cause more pain and unwanted memories...

but..if you really like someone..don't give up easily...ask...if s/he is a good friend of yours...s/he won't mind being asked about his/her status in a relationship...don't simply conclude things that you are not sure...

friends will forever be friends...but lovers..once its ruined...it'll ruin forever!

after reading this entry... i am pretty sure that i won't be the one that you gonna turn to when it comes about this lovey dovey thingy.

*now it make sense why i love being friend with 'not so straight guy'...at least..they are always with me no matter what..the best part is to know that they love you but will never fall for you...


- E N D -

Friday, March 23, 2012

the day after...

memang paham benar dengan ungkapan tidur tak lena, mandi tak basah, makan tak kenyang...

that's me before submission...

and right after submission...no matter how bad/awful i've presented my board...seriously...my heart starts beating normally again...mandi memang rasa macam bersih gila..(padahal sama je routinenya hari2 pon)..tidur rasa berkualiti...and finally..i can eat with a definite inner peace..

as usual...routine in launceston wont change that much..the way we have fun can never so different...the people we met were mostly almost the same..u know everyone...and everyone know you...that's launnie...

provoke issues that had been raised during meeting as well are the same type of questions that i wish i can choose not to answer....

observer i am..and lately...i found myself randomly judging people around me...(hadoi!) this is definly not good...and those hunches that i hate...oi..it happened...warned..but still..mcm tak paham paham ke....???!!

and the best words came from one of this dearest kakak...
'tak kenal maka tak cinta'

so..lantak la....dah lepas dah part kau kunang! pandai la nak pikir!

- E N D -

Monday, March 19, 2012

rasanya ini homesick

weird eh? so ni laa perasaan homesick??? dulu dok pelik2 kenapa orang dok sibuk2 homesick....so..rasanya ni homesick...

tambah perisa lak bila tengok video maher zain ni haaaa....


- E N D -

Sunday, March 18, 2012

when something bad happens, you have three choices. you can either let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you

title from random website...

so, before i dedicate my whole valuable priceless week for PP(professional project) and DS(design studio)...i would love to write something before i go all 'gila' with everything....

so..next week will be a hectic week..for me...i hope everything goes well...i hope i'll have all the strength that i might need...i hope i'll have all the fantastic idea coming in ...i hope i don't do silly things like 'tido selamba sebab fed up'...or 'nangis tak pasal pasal sebab tatau ape nak buat?' when the panic attacked...i become stupid! i act foolishly, and lambat sikit nak sedar diri..-___-'

so...here..i would like to address my deepest thank you to all who had been supporting me..who had cherished me with beautiful words and kindness... i really appreciate it...i won't mention any names...you know who you are..or maybe not.. (",)

i am easily distracted..easily get bored..and easily annoyed...being 'pushy' is definly not my thing..and im expecting the same thing from others too...

' You know my name, not my story. You've heard what I've done, not what I've been through'
quote i copied from twitter...

mari bekerja..!!

- E N D -

Monday, March 12, 2012

badly need motivation

serabut..kusut..
ditelan...diluah...mati jua....
ya..tidak...jawapannya tetap salah...
mara...berundur..impak negatif tetap ada...

berserah.

- E N D -

Sunday, March 11, 2012

the moment i think i got it...i'm actually losing it

seperti biasa...

minggu baru nak  bermula ni...mula la rasa serabut tak tentu hala....tapi stress ni tak boleh dilayan sangat... keluar bersosial nampaknya satu penyelesaian yg agak baik...(mengadu pada Allah juga  amat penting dalam menangani stress)

seriously...kalau dipikir2 balik...i don't know how i m gonna survive this semester.. tapi...yeah..inshaAllah...dengan hati yang tekad takmo stuck di bumi Launceston ni...mungkin akan menggerakkan sikit otak ni untuk berfikir...

owh...minggu ini boleh dikatakan agak rich dengan cerita...ada saja 'interesting' event yang berlaku...ada yg terlalu "interesting" sampai rasa mahu saja tunggu bas kalau2 ada yang pergi malaysia...(pathetic)

hal duniawi tak payah cerita...dah bosan nak dengar...dah malas nak kisah...dah meluat juga sikit nak tahu...masing2 dah besar...dah tahu mana betul mana salah...

belom lagi masing-masing sibuk dengan stress masing-masing...semua orang seperti berlumba-lumba 'show off'
masalah siapa lebih besar...dan kadang kadang terlupa(aku guna lupa, sebab mereka tahu) orang yg mereka minta tolong tu masalahnya berganda ganda lebih berat dari mereka...

kalau kisah kelas...tak lain tak bukan..mesti lah kisah "pilih bulu" yang tak berkesudahan...tapi tak boleh nak salahkan mereka...kalau kita di tempat mereka..kita mungkin sama...ataupon lebih keji...(teringat kisah satu-satunya student iran di studio uitm..mesti dia rasa kami racist)

namun, cukup terharu dengan T (takmo lah tulis nama...~) susah nak cari local yang baik...yang tiba-tiba nak stand up for international...tapi memang lah dia tak bersuara untuk semua asian...rasanya memang so far aku je yg dapat treatment begitu...tak dinafikan...lately dah mcm bestfriend gitew~...local sure meluat...tapi itu semua dari-Nya juga...Dia yang menggerakkan T untuk bersuara on behalf of me..kalau tak..memang lunyai kena tembak...ye...memang aku ada aura menarik gay...T is gay...dan memang ke mana saja aku pergi..memang akan ada sorang yang akan sesat berkawan baik dengan aku...kenapa? smpai sekarang tak terjawab persoalan kenapa the gays keep coming in my life...tapi bila T back up research question aku yg tak berapa nak strong tu...rasa nak nangis peluk dia terharu...(over tapi serious~)

research question memang dah rasa nak cakap 'pergi mati la sama kau...' semalam kau kata 'ok, good'...hari ni ko kata...'you should change'...tapi bila colour sendiri yang bersuara..pandai pulak ko bagi idea macam macam...(okey~prejudis habis!)

yang sibuk go against everything...yerp...i am still your friend no matter how..tapi yang salah tetap la salah! (okey, cakap bajet innocent tak pernah buat salah~)

*risau, panic, takut...tapi semua tu tak memberi idea pon!
**belum campur menyesal sebab tindakan yang dibuat..tapi semuanya ada pros n cons...


gambar dah agak basi...tapi 85% Melayu yang ada kat Launnie ada dalam gamba ni..
sikit kan?
photo : bakhtiar

gambar fresh dari advance surprise birthday party Farra...motif gambar? saja..~ suka sebab tengok semua orang nampak happy dalam gamba ni macam tak serabut je~ 
padahal...ada yg homesick, ada yg down, ada yg rasa inferior tak tentu pasal...tapi dalam gamba ni mcm stress-free je masin-masing...
photo : raja syazwina


we choose what we want to be..like seriously~

- E N D -

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

sedih...but my sedih won't change anything..AT ALL!!!

sincerely from me to You

thank you for the hands
thank you for the shoulders
thanks for the ears

thank you for the brain You lent me
i think i've used it very well to guide the heart so it gets stronger
inshaAllah

- E N D -

Monday, March 5, 2012

i always believe in that tingkap and pintu...seriously...

have you ever heard,

- when He closed the door, He left the window(s) open?

- nothing cannot be solved...

heard 'em...and i always believe in 'em...

so, now i have 1 thing left to worry...which is suppose to be 2...no...im not sure..but the major concern now is Geoff...

i have friends who i can talk to...who would be happy to cheer me up...who would be happy to lend a hand...and would be happy to do silly jokes although they already knew how i would react...

and i am seriously easily touched by the random kindness...when i am really in need of something, and suddenly a friend came offering his/her hand/shoulder/ear or whatever ...i couldn't express how grateful i am...having these wonderful people around...really makes my life happier...

thank you for cheering me up..! thank you ... thank you ... thank you!

usaha, doa, tawakal.

- E N D -

Sunday, March 4, 2012

cuak ke ape ni...

cuak weyh tak pasal pasal...
like seriously CUAK...perasaan panic macam nak presentation depan seribu manusia...

mengapa aku begitu yakin ini adalah cuak melampau?

sebab rasa nak muntah!

benti jap...distract diri sendiri jap...cuba pikir balik..ape ntah yang aku panic sangat ni....
asal masuk minggu baru je berdebar..ape kejadahnya semua ini?

kenapa mesti combine DS & PP? T______T


- E N D -

street art vs vandalism

so..that street art vs vandalism would be my advance design research subject...

so, as usual...C would say something like..'if you want to research something...you have to be one'...so..im now trying to be one....NOT!

being around with the people is enough... (kang aku pulak skali jadi gadis graffiti...pecer...!!)

so, now im currently searching for people that i can interview...graffiti artist...anyone...anyone that will willingly share thoughts, opinions, and pictures...or anyone who don't mind webcam-ing with me...(fyi...i will record the webcam session, so i can share it with everyone in the self directed group)

so, why suddenly street art in Malaysia?
definly culture i must say...here in Australia...we appreciate street art...it didnt happen that way back in Malaysia...we see it as vandalism all the time...very little that appreciate street art...

So, as one of the art lover, i am happy to share...and happier if anyone would like to share their thought with me...

what has all those graffiti stuff has to do with architecture..???
it's all depends on what the graffiti artist might say...their answer will be the key trigger to my research...

*excited...cross finger...
**hopefully ramai yg sudi di interbiu..

cilok gambo feeza...pizza kali ni tak bape sedap! stress ai... dah lama tak buat gamaknye...tapi tengok dorang makan laju je..berani laaa tak makan kan....!!! hahahahahah....



- E N D -