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Thursday, June 14, 2012

I feel like a nerd trying hard to deal with his life...er...his?


i wonder how can i live this way...have a look at my own room make me feel like a man...or hipster much? 

i took a glance at all my bags i hung at the corner of the room...i do own a handbag...(which i kept safe and sound in the drawer..) haven't use it yet...i use sling bag most of the time...or messenger bag...i look at the book i read nowadays...and i was like..what am i? hipster? artist? or hipster again? -__-" i look at the stuff i drew...and i was like...that's so me...i look at the playlist i had..thank god i still listen to some girly song....

yeah..ni namanya paranoid tak pasal2....

thank God i do own some pink stuff and my table cover is grey with pink star pattern...(yeah i bought it because its cheap..~)and some girly pattern wrapper that i use to wrap boxes to place some stuffs... or else...macam identity crisis je bilik haku ni rasanya... T__T

but..i do wear skirts..i use make up sometimes..i love kids...i read girl's book...i like cute things..i mean..i do what other girls do..am i? yerp..i might be a bit more ignorant than others... 

i am tired to be seen as all the time cool or okay...or MR.know everything or read everything..tired to be compared with matt...(seriously??? why can't i be compared with catriona or ceridwen instead..or anu???) each time i've been compared...i am compared to a man...like seriously?? is that a compliment? or should i feel offended??

i would like to say i don't give a damn...but to not give a damn about stuff that happen to you everyday..it seems impossible...

euwww...

shouldn't i be collecting more girl stuff? and read more girly stuff? am i really into art? am i? do i look like i can rephrase all the words from any books? or do i remind you towards someone...??

all and all..i just a normal human being who care about herself... try to improve herself...and do what she likes... 

i am not trying to be like someone...no intention at all to remind you towards someone...i say what i feel...and when i said it..i meant it...it doesn't go the other way around where when people said no..it meant yes...

hell no...!!

i might look like someone...might sound like someone...but to be brilliant like that someone...NOT YET!!!

*benar lah nasihat mak...bersikap seperti 'perempuan' sket!
i am..am i?

- E . N . D -






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