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Monday, December 31, 2012

Hey..see you next year!!!

Itu lah lawak-lawak lame hari ni...

So sekarang rumah dah dekat dengan budak-budak kecik...maka tiba-tiba rasa macam famous..hari hari ada orang cari..3 saat skali ada orang panggil mintak attention...or kalau tengah lepak umah aqilah..budak-budak kecit ni datang ajak aku balik umah sendiri...bila aku cakap rumah aku boring takde game...diorang cakap takpe..."kitorang nak duduk je kat rumah kakak"..

Haih la kanak-kanak... serabut living with them..and can't live without them...

Belum kira tiba-tiba slang sendiri yang bertukar menjadi slang tassie akibat bercakap ngan bebudak kecik ni..isk isk isk...lupa diri kau kunang!!

Rumah memang belum habis kemas...its a never ending tales bab mengemas ni..ada je mende nak dikemas..hahaha..yang pasti gardener call tadi kata nak datang esok..siap tanya boleh datang tak esok..or aku akan bangun pagi tak esok..almaklum..takut aku hang over macam mat saleh lain lettew..

So..banyak sebenarnya nak bebel..like mencanang resolutions sendiri di alam maya...

Oh..semalam baca horoscope..not the predictions..we were reading about the characteristic..stok stok fadillah kamsah tulis budak lahir bulan june sebenar banyak cakap..haaaa giteww...baca..gelak-gelak macam orang gila kat mcD..lepas tu balik..part aku...harus la kena kaw kaw..gemini kan macam banyak je mende untuk dibahankan..part tak pnah serious..talkative..atrong characteristic..bla..bla..bla..btol je kebanyakan nya..balik umah masing-masing sugar rush..terus hyper macam kanak-kanak hyper...main kinect ntah berapa round..penat macam bersukan beria..lepas tu baru reti nak tido..

Owh..azam yang ingin saya canangkan di sini...

Saya takmo shopping buku dah...takmo..takmo..takmo..

Saya nak habiskan semua canvas...biar seme berlukis...

Saya mahu jadi less grumpy...ye..saya akan cuba menjadi lebih sopan...lemah lembut..errr..lembut..tidak lemah...

Takmo takut dengan abang jep dah!!! Takmo!

1 book at least in 2 weeks..walaupon sebenarnya bila class dah start macam 2 books in a day kadang kadang tu..maksudnya..macam nak ada satu bahan bacaan yang tak menyesakkan otak laa...

Mahu berjimat cermat..berjimat cermat kan amalan mulia!!

Rasa macam nak jadi vegetarian..tapi kang anemia balik kang susah plak...kadang-kadang tengah makan daging tu terasa kesian kat haiwan haiwan ..acaner tu??

10000 langkah seminggu.. (kak nadd..saya buat formula sendiri..hahahah ) ye..sepatutnya 10000 langkah sehari..masalah nya..time submission..yg bergerak kadang-kadang tu mata ngan tangan je...lepas 6 jam duduk tak bergerak..bila berdiri rasa tulang nak patah semua..

No more gadget..no more new cloth..no more new shoes...mampukah??? T_T

Nak jalan habiskan tasmania ni..nak pegi semua hutan..semua sungai..semua laut..semua tasik..yaaahhh..

Nak tidur dan bangun di waktu yang betul..walaupon macan mustahil.. sebab sekarang subuh pukul 330pagi..and penyakit aku bila dah bangun..seksa nya nak tido balik..haih..kalo boleh takmo buat kerja tak tido..mahu tido..kesian system badan sendiri weyh!!

Khatam at least 2 kali setahun...ok..discount jadi sekali boley??? Ye..aku tahu..ramai orang khatam quran sekali sebulan..lek jee.. T_T

Mahu jadi lebih resourceful..so maknanya..harus membaca lebih banyak...

Appreciate people more...I know I always like take for granted about almost everything and everyone...well anyway..I seems like it..but tak pon...I am just not good in expressing it..

Kalau kata nak kurus boleh?? Datang tasmania dah jadi macam kambeng tassie jugak sihatnya.. ok laaa..nak menjadi lebih sihat..I mean...sihat..not 'sihat'...bapak aku dah risau sebab bila aku gain weight aku salu tak sihat...so..mari lose weight.. #muntah

Mahu sentiasa positive tapi sentiasa berwaspada juga...

Apa lagi ntah...tapi yang pasti..yang tak baik kat character horoscope smalam tu aku takmo buat dah kalau boleh..or kurangkan...

Aku serious..tapi tak pernah serious...haih..susah gini...

Last but not least...

Yang tahun tahun lepas punya resolutionsbpon tak tercapai lagi..sibuk apa nak buat yang baru..duhhh...

Sayang menyayangi lah kita..hahahhaha...buat apa ntah benci..apa dapat?? Sakit hati jee..

E N D

Sunday, December 30, 2012

It seems like you're ready

I think we both are ready to 'delete' each other...
A new start we shall look for,
We both know this moment will come anyway.
Thanks for being there when I needed someone.

E N D

2012 hampir ke penghujungnya

Menaip sambil berbaring malas...sementara menunggu aqilah menghantar angah n achik balik ke rumah mereka..lama pulak ngantar nya...rumah sendiri blom habis berkemas...untungnya rumah berjiran..rasa malas..pegi lepak rumah orang lain dulu..rasa bosan melepak..tido..bangun tido...sambung kemas..ada mood..main kinect sampai pancit...lapar..kalo bukan aku masak..kau masak..pegi balik rumah sendiri..kalau rajin jalan kaki..kalau malas naik kereta..kalau banyak berfikir..memang tak patut langsung naik kereta...sendawa pon boleh dengar dekatnya rumah kami...

Oh summer..panas di siang hari..sejuk seperti winter di malamnya...mengantuk doplohpatjam... hitam itu sudah pasti..letak la sebotol sunblock skali pon..duduk lah dalam rumah macam mana pon..burn tetap burn...

Launceston oh Launceston.

Masyarakat Melayu hampir pupus.

E N D

Monday, December 17, 2012

Manusia..berakal, tapi selalu bertindak seperti tiada akal

Kisah sahabat... serius aku simpati..sangat simpati...owh..boleh buka fanpage dia untuk tahu cerita...sakit kawan aku..sakit jugak aku...

Yang dah jadi..biarkan...
Banyak yang boleh dipelajari... diinsafi..

Tak susah..yang salah dibetulkan... yang tak salah tapi menimbulkan rasa hasad di hati elakkan..tak perlu dicela..dicaci...dilontarkan kata kata seolah olah kita lebih baik dicipta olehNya dari yang lain...

Menghina fizikal seseorang seolah olah menghina kejadian Allah juga... yang buruk zahirnya..mungkin lebih mulia di mataNya...

Tak perlu spekulasi liar...jangan berprasangka terhadap Allah...hari ujian kita bakal tiba jua.. masing masing punya giliran...

Syukur dengan kehidupan sendiri...

Bergaya pakai barang branded...kulit mulus gebu...tapi hati sampah... nyata kehadiran kau di muka bumi ini hanyalah untuk mencukupkan rantaian makanan..dan memberi pengajaran kepada yang masih rasional dan positif...

Yana & Azfar.. memang takde sape setuju dengan aproach 'mangkuk' tu... aku tahu sebagai parents korang sure lagi sakit hati sebab aku orang luar pon rasa nak pegi benam hidup hidup mangkuk tu...

Dia manusia biasa...maafkan dia..doakan dia sedar silap dia dan tak buat dah kat orang lain...

Hidup tak susah. Yang salah dibetulkan. Hormat.

Ye..panggil dia mangkuk pon dah kira biadap...

E N D

Saturday, December 15, 2012

Ke bumi kangaroo semula

Summer...winter...musim confuse untuk diri sendiri...

Summer...~
4 pagi dah subuh..1030 malam baru nak isyak..pukul 930 tu yang mengantuk tapi kena tahan jugak sebab belum isyak...subuh cincai2 pukul 430 laaa...tapi lepas 430 nak buat ape??? Bukan nya mudah nak tido bila dah bangun..time submission je mata ni mengantuk manjang..tak payah disorong bantal..pandai je kepala ni cari bantal.. T_T

Winter...~
Boleh kira berapa jam sahaja yang bercahaya...keluar rumah gelap..balik rumah gelap...solat pulak..rasa kerap nya lah haih..pukul 1645 dah maghrib...kalo ramadhan..pukul 8 dah selesai terawikh..balik tu dah mengantuk..mungkin sbb gelap kot~

Masalah sekarang...dah nak pukul 2..kenapa ko tak tido lagi?

Jetlag... T_T

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Tarikh tutup

Orang berusaha untuk diri sendiri aku rimas
Yang mak pak beria berusaha untuk anak sendiri pon aku rimas

Mari nekad.
Macam bukan aku.

*" separuh semangat dia lelaki" terang seorang kawan lelaki kepada seorang kawan lelaki lain sambil tunjuk kat aku.

E N D

Sunday, December 9, 2012

Ini susah

Susah
Bila kita ter kenal seseorang

Lagi susah
Bila kita betul betul kenal

Bertambah susah
Kita sahaja yang tahu kisah hati hitamnya

Pernah tengok tak cerekarama orang jahat bagitahu plan dia kat seseorang
Tapi orang jahat ni image dia di mata ramai, dia yang paling mulia

Kalau korang..??

A - Biar buat tak paham sebab kalo korang bagitau takde sape nak percaya plus korang akan dibenci

B - Warning mangsa awal-awal lepas tu putus sahabat, putus tali persaudaraan

C - Menyesal kemudian hari sebab lepas si mangsa susah, compem akan cari korang jugak

D - Mari tamatkan riwayat si penjahat tadi..tapi nanti sampai sudah takde sape tahu dia jahat

Haaaaa...

Acaner acaner???

Ini kes serius.

- E N D -

Saturday, December 8, 2012

Cita cita saya

Ini bukan cita cita nak jadi apa
Ini cita cita cerita angan angan

Cita cita saya nak design rumah sendiri
Tak dapat design rumah, interior rumah sendiri pon dah bagus

Cita cita saya nak ada library dalam rumah
Dah tak mampu tengok design library smart smart kat internet je~

Cita cita je laaa
Sebab baru seminit lepas berazam taknak beli buku selain buku berkaitan pelajaran smpai 3 tahun lagi
Minit yang sekarang ni, dah mula meragui azam sendiri

Ok

Tuka cita cita la camni

Cita cita saya nak bukak kedai buku.. T_T

BBW2012

- E N D -

Friday, December 7, 2012

Sensitif

Aku tak boleh jadi kaunselor...tak pasal aku emo lagi lebih dari patient..

Kadang-kadang kita lupa siapa makan garam dulu...

Atau mungkin kita fikir mereka makan garam dulu..tapi kita makan garam lagi banyak?

Pulanglah...

- E N D -

Berita

Banyaknya bad news...
Innalillah..

Semoga semua tabah menghadapi ujianNya.

E N D

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

mari merungut?

memang sudah jadi tabiat renung ke bawah
kerana jarang jumpa yang boleh dipandang tinggi


harapan..doa..adalah untuk semuanya lancar...
tak sanggup lagi berpanjangan panik
Dia lebih tahu.

*pasti janggal lepas ni takde dah budak kecik ni...mungkin lebih lena tidur tanpa tamparan dan sepakan...rindu itu pasti.

- E N D -

Monday, December 3, 2012

Hard day and I don't know if I even deserve a hope

Sincerely...I think I deserve neither the hope nor the chance...

And for today..today only...I want to stop giving a damn about everything...

I hope it is just PMS.

Seriously.

And I hope tomorrow will be a better day.

No kidding.

- E N D -

Advice

A friend call...

'Kunang..I need help..I need advice..I had a fight with my boyfriend..and I dont know what to do..?'

So..I listen..and confuse why on earth this friend seek for an advise from a single friend...?and...this friend mentioned fight...what kind of fight??? Or I am just thinking too much?

Then again...I remember my conversation with some other friends..maybe this is a curse...

Yes maybe...

Dunia akhir zaman...
Bila yang 'berjenis' sibuk pilih kaum sejenis...
Tak payah sibuk tanya aku bila nak kawen.

Belum terlambat untuk kembali ke pangkal jalan...kawan..

-E N D -

Sunday, December 2, 2012

Pretending

This word.
Has its own history.
This word.
Has its own story.

To pretend might be easy.
Start it and you must finish it.pretend.

To be able to pretend is a gift.
You lie to others.

But.

Irony.
You lie to yourself.

Pathetic.

The dumbest part is to say 'I rather stay pathetic than being honest and destroy all the happiness in the world'

- E N D -

Saturday, December 1, 2012

Kepochi mak jemah

Jumpa member-member lama...tetiba masing masing bertukar character jadi mak jemah...huahuahuaha...

bertukar!!!!

- E N D -

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Seronoknya...

Seronok sangat manusia bila bercerita tentang keaiban orang lain...lebih hina...yang mendengar dan mengiakan...

Pimpin tangan ke neraka...pegang erat erat...

Yang tak sudi dengar turut dicela...mungkin patut ditampor sekeping dua?

Sudah sudah laaaa...

Monday, November 26, 2012

identity crisis...not!!

As usual...rasa macam diri ada crisis dengan diri sendiri..RASA....

Ska used to tell me this...

"Ko suka..tapi nanti ko rimas"

Betul la tu...

*kesian niece aku ni...dapat auntie ignorant.. tapi menempek je dia... manja betul budak ni...esok2 dia dah takde depan mata ni teringat laa scene2 dia bermanja2 lepas tu aku rasa macam nak cepuk je sebab rimas..haih...lepas tu setiap masa lapar...perut aku ngan dia mcm perut aku lagi besar..mana space dia bubuh makanan dia makan tu...??? Portion makanan dia? Double or maybe triple yang aku makan..nak tuduh tak bismillah before makan beria dia tadah tangan baca doa makan...

Oke..dah start rimas...

Anak2 sedara aku semua tido bersilat...wai wai wai???  T_T

-E N D-

Friday, November 23, 2012

Serious talk

I had this serious talk with my mom this afternoon..so..normally..usually..whenever I say serious talk...it refers to the marriage thingy..

Now that I m old enough and got no boyfriend (steady one) and everyone starts talking about it...

I had bunch of people asking me about why I still single... and seriously... I dont have answer for it... sometimes it was me who refuse to be in the relationship...due to many factors...like I was super young at the moment these guys ask me about tying the knot while all I had in mind is just what to draw for the next project...(i'll reconsider my answer if they ask me now..haha) or I just knew I cant stand them..

Selebihnya..ayat mudah..takde sape yang berkenan...ayat yang orang tua-tua tak bape berkenan nak dengar...

Most of the closest friend of mine have not yet get married...and some of them are still single..same goes to the cousins...they're still single and I can see that they're happy with their status now...hmmm...

But the elders especially..the aunties..mommies..and surprisingly the uncles as well..they are all worried about us....maybe all of us should stay together if we're not married ey? And I can sure the whole big family will go ballistic with this 'not getting married' idea...

'Tarikh tutup' dah lepas...but at this stage..they cant say anything since I still have another year to finish the course insyaAllah..how do we tell them not to worry about this matter?

*Penat dah nak jawab soalan soalan berkaitan ini...takde jawapan...belum lagi dengar spekulasi risau mereka pasal keturunan kami yang ramai tak kawin..haih..kebetulan je tuuuu... -_-

Kalau boleh timbang kati jodoh ni macam beli buah...semua orang dah kawen dah aku rasa...

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Cuti sangaaatttt...

Ni lah buah hati tak berapa buah hati..pengarang jantung tak berapa karang...time rasa malas nak kawan aku biar je dia terabai..hahaha..

E N D

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Bagi satu takkan pulangnya dua

Sama kisah
Buat jahat dapat dosa
Buat baik dapat pahala
Buat biadap,  takde nya tiba tiba orang nak suka kau,
Buat baik, orang bodoh je benci kau.

Simple.
Apa yang susah sangat nak paham?

E N D

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Few times in a week..or maybe less than a week..

Bini no 2?

Selain daripada membuat kami rasa like "we don't deserve to be the first and the only one..."

How do I put away the perspective that you set yourself in our mind...???

Honestly...buruk benar perspective yang korang set tu...

Motif soalan begitu?

E N D

Monday, November 12, 2012

luka masih berdarah

AlFatihah...

untuk arwah Ayah. (panggilan untuk arwah-Raja Ahmad Zaki)



tengah mengemas ternampak card ni...pedihnya rasa hati.

lepas bukak dan baca...rasa yang tak tergambar dengan kata-kata.

aku tak paham...

kenapa susah sangat nak let it go? kau ingat kau sorang sedih? kau tu siapa je...

tengah biar mp3 shuffle sendiri..terkeluar pulak lagu 'my way'...buat masa ni...aku rasa lagu tu 'berhantu'..aku tak boleh dengar...sebab nanti aku terus break down...sebab terlalu banyak cerita di sebalik lagu tu...

Allahuakbar... tabah Kunang! banyak pengajaran. banyak hikmah yang dah kau nampak dan bakal nampak.

masa aku kat sana, dia mintak nak tengok cerita 'while you were sleeping'... aku tak pernah tengok cerita tu...teringin nak tengok...

tapi...

aku tau aku belum cukup tabah...

Allahuakbar...

semoga mereka lebih tabah.

- E N D -

biar papa asal bergaya

baru nak tulis entry yang lebih kurang sama kisah nya...

blogwalking sat...skali dia dah tulis mende yang lebih kurang...

aku tak tahu siapa yang cipta prinsip ni...

'biar papa asal bergaya'

'biar menyesal beli, jangan menyesal tak beli'

terima kasih kepada perkataan impression.

terima kasih juga kepada mulut-mulut manusia plastic yang sibuk belek brand ape baju kau pakai, jam apa kau sarung, barang branded apa lagi yang kau punya.

simpati juga kerana gagal mengawal nafsu untuk tidak membazir seolah-olah harta takkan habis diguna.

apa guna kawan 'plastic' yang kau kejar sedangkan bila susah kawan 'sampah' kau ni jugak yang kau cari?

kau nak papa..kau papa lah sorang-sorang... berfikir sebelum bertindak..dah bertindak baru nak berfikir...dah tak berguna...

ye..dalam kepala kau..kau sorang yang tahu...yang dalam kepala aku..aku punya pasal.

- E N D -

Sunday, November 11, 2012

dunia ini kecil.

mutual friend bersepah.

aku boleh nampak mak aku kadang-kadang meluat.
kadang-kadang buat muka hairan.

ke mana pergi ada je yang kenal.
asal sembang sure kawan orang lain kawan aku.
kawan aku, kawan aku sorang.

nak lagi stress.
cerita pasal kawan bapak aku. aku kenal  jugak.
buat lagi  tak tahan. anak nya kawan aku.

baru nak introduce.
aku dah mula ayat tipikal aku.

orang kenal dah dia ni.

sikit lagi sure ada yang putus asa.

kelompok komuniti aku mungkin kecik sangat.
balik balik jumpa yang tu jugak.

yang aku tak paham. macam mana mak pak kami juga boleh berkawan?
boleh tak tahu pulak tu. (lempang muka sendiri laju-laju)

- E N D -

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

they ruin my day..just like that!!

bad customer service... judging sales assistant... are people that i hope will disappear from this world... if killing is not consider as crime... i am more than happy to kill this people for FREE...

i went to two place today.. in fact..i just got back and can't wait to blog about my day.

in the morning...i went to this spectacle shop..yup..i badly need a new glasses..i almost blind at night... but the sales assistant annoyed me.. when i said i wanted a square-ish frame..she said it would be better if i had an oval one..when i said...i  prefer square..she still insist of me on having the oval one...

one simple rule...

CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT

check power mata pon belom..semua pon belum...sibuk dia nak jual frame...so..try not to be mean at first...i said..maybe we should go and check my eyes first..and she insist of picking the frame first...bila customer tak happy..semua jadi hodoh... maka terus tak jadi... politely i said...it seems like i don't like any of the frame... so maybe next time i datang pulak..baru sibuk nak keluarkan frame square...tak payah! dah terlambat.!!!

next story..

i went to art friend later... remember the art shop i wrote before?...about how i love the shop? it is located at The Garden

ok..i still love the shop... but i hate the staff who worked today. i believe the lady is the boss or the owner or something...

i am pissed off...like seriously pissed... i have registered myself as a member last month if im not mistaken.... and the staff who served me ask for my IC number... (the had this cardless membership...and i hate this system...) and i can see its written there as invalid... and the staff who served me made 'the face' which annoyed me like hell...and without any attempt to re-check or at least politely ask about my membership...he just checked out all the items...and total it... so i asked later..

'what happen to my membership?'

'it's invalid.' told the staff

'you don't even re-check my ic number..'

he made this face (sangat mintak pelempang) and the boss came ..

she ask...'when did you register your membership?'

i told her it's around last month or few weeks before..i can't recall..but i did register...

and she ask me whether i still keep the receipt... and i was like...who's on earth keep their receipt...bukan boleh claim ke ape..and its like RM10 or 15 membership..(mati tak ingat...bersepah membership sana sini..)

i know that member will get 10% off...and i bought quite a lot..with that 10% off...i could buy at least a tall starbucks coffee...so..harus la aku upset..

and surprisingly...the lady said to me... IF you had registered your membership...just bring over the receipt...IF you  had register...of course your name will appear or our staff had key in your name wrongly...

and still..no effort of checking my details...

okay la...

dear Art Friend owner...

as an art lover... i love your shop...i fell in love with the shop first  time i step  into it..but today's incident disappoint me...the way you served me..the way you talk as if i had lied about the membership part really annoyed me... hope you wont do it again to anyone...i might go again to your store at least once again...but if the same thing keep happening...'accusing' your customer lied about their membership...

you'll lost one of the customer...or maybe more than one...i buy a lot of art stuff all the time...i know losing one customer won't effect you... but we art people...are linked!

you 'hurt' one of us...you 'hurt' us all.

* tu belum kisah sales asssistant kat kedai lain... i think the reason i love book shop is because the people in the book shop usually wont judge..they dont care how you look like...kau cantik ke hodoh ke...kau masuk nak beli or just nak tengok-tengok...kau pakai bag brand ape...baju brand apa...kasut apa...perfume apa.. they just don't care... that is why i always love the 'book people'.

one of thousand things i hate about malaysia/malaysian...

the JUDGING part!

- E N D -

Monday, November 5, 2012

status? It's complicated

i had this very complicated love-hate relationship with architecture.

i don't think i am obsessed with everything related to architecture like some of my friends...

yes, i do enjoy exploring software...but it doesn't mean anything at all.. exploring software is like exploring new games...

i love the crucial part where you seen nothing but problems in certain project...it's like deciding which is the party to be chose during election...you see the problem...but you try hard to make it become an ultimate opportunity.. you studied it..sometimes you lie to yourself that it's gonna work.. or you kept crossing your finger hoping it will work..

i think i hate urban design..but the truth is..i like urban design more than anything else..

i just found out that my way of thinking in architecture field is from major to minor...when i start to change my way of thinking so i could be just like everyone else..i screwed up...i am that random girl who always see things in a bigger picture.. (exaggerated much? hahaha )

*aku rasa aku macam dah tahu kenapa projek tu semua macam 'bukan aku'. i still remember my 'kampung' presentation..being the only one who presented it without master plan.. -berani mati- T_T but the invention silent the panel. oke...syok sendiri...syok sendiri...

**tips untuk idea - read. jangan asyik tengok gambar je. impression je tu. macam kalo ko tengok orang cantik/hensem tapi bila kenal macam sampah. camtu aaa..


kalau tengah edit gambar camni pon meleleh air liur..lagi mahu cakap tak suka archi..? ptuih!!


- E N D -

Sunday, November 4, 2012

berita lagi

abah kepada seorang sahabat sekolah baru sahaja pergi pukul 4 petang tadi.

banyak betul berita kematian.

yang ini sedikit sebanyak terkesan. kerana kawan ini selalu menghiburkan di kelas dulu. pernah datang tidur rumah. pernah merepek merapu bersama. pernah kena marah dengan cikgu tapi end up cikgu marah sebab aku tak pernah bercakap.(pendiam pon salah..yang lain kena marah sebab terlalu bising..cikgu blah seme takley terima aku 'pendiam' haha..) owh..those days.

so. dengan kenangan begitu.mustahil tak sedih tengok dia sedih.

moga arwah ditempatkan di kalangan yang beriman.

- E N D -

Thursday, November 1, 2012

my fan club

handling female fan seems to be way harder than the male.

*i almost never had any interest towards anyone...i mean..like fondly adore someone... so i just don't understand these thingy...how come you can like someone for no reason..just like that..

FYI..they are not lesbian...some of them aren't. i do have gay fan too. and i think i'm gonna ask them one day why they like me so much...maybe we should just be friend and stop this fan club thingy...

confused.confuse.and will always stay that  way.

- E N D -

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

hampir selesai

kita merancang, Allah menentukan...

rancangan asal...ingin membantu sahabat yang sedang bermatian-matian dengan 3D...maaf. serius aku kesal tak dapat bantu.

aturanNya adalah untuk aku membantu menguruskan yang hidup menghadapi kematian dan kehilangan...

ramai yang pergi tak kembali. minggu sebelumnya bapa kepada travel buddy. 'sentap'nya belum habis kerana aku sampai di kala arwah baru sahaja pergi. tiada siapa yang tiba. aku orang pertama untuk mengeluarkan perkataan 'sabar' mahupun 'kuat'. kau kena kuat!! ternyata tidak mudah.

ada juga bapa, ibu, rakan rakan lain yang pergi di minggu yang sama. tidak terkesan. tapi yang pasti, aku sangat simpati.

tapi entry ini bukan cerita-cerita itu. ini cerita aidil adha.

sedih. itu pasti. ramai yang tertanya-tanya. kenapa tiada setitis air mata pon yang jatuh? sedangkan aku anak saudara yang paling rapat dengan arwah. aku sudah menangis. cuma bukan di waktu semuanya sedang menangis. tapi memang sedikit benar sedihnya, peritnya. mungkin kerana aku sudah bersedia untuk cerita ini. bagaimana aku boleh begitu straight face? Dia aturkan. aku tiada jawapan untuk itu. sebelum pergi melawat arwah lebih kurang tiga minggu lepas, aku dah bina kekuatan dalam diri supaya tak menitis air mata dihadapannya. Alhamdulillah. diperkenankanNya rancangan itu.

banyak yang aku belajar. serius banyak.

bohong kalau aku kata aku tak teringat langsung, tak terngiang langsung. kami kira hari menuju ke aidil adha bersama. rupanya itu hari dia pergi.

tipu kalau aku cakap aku tak rasa ralat bila aku menolak untuk tinggal lebih lama. lagi serabut bila arwah kata 'sekejap je lagi Ayah nak Na teman Ayah'. memang sekejap.

tapi 'kalau' itu perkataan bahaya. kadang kala buat kita lupa. itu qada' dan qadar.

semoga ditempatkan di kalangan yang beriman. Al Fatihah.

*untuk yang masih hidup. teruskan hidup. tidak rugi untuk pegang prinsip : kerjalah seperti akan hidup selama-lamanya dan beribadahlah seperti akan mati esok hari.
- E N D -

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Thank you

Innalillah..

Another news...

Al fatihah.. Raja Ahmad Zaki Raja Hirdan..

You'll be missed.
Thanks for everything...thank you for the 'thank you'...
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Tuesday, October 23, 2012

tak tau tajuk apa yang sesuai..

satu petang yang biasa biasa di hujung minggu...aku pegi dapur..sebab belum makan...(rumah aku memang kadang-kadang mak aku tak masak..aku confuse...) tengah usha-usha apa boleh aku lambung masuk dalam kuali...

aku tengah dok layan semua channel masakan kat astro..bertambah-tambah la rasa lapar..haih...

aku dengar mak aku kata.."masak nasik please! nak makan!" aku tanya balik.."nak makan lauk ape..??" selamba mak aku jawab.. "telur mata ngan kicap.." sedih aku mendengarnya..

aku pon cakap balik.."orang nak masak nasik berperasa.." (mampus laaa..aku tak tau ape nama nasik yang aku nak masak ni...aku tahu aku tengah rasa nak makan satu 'rasa' yang aku dah imagine kat tekak..)

mak aku tanya lebih-lebih..aku pon tak reti nak explain...tapi last-last dia cakap sukati aku..janji nasi...dia kena redha aku masak memang resepi sendiri a.k.a manjang mandai-mandai..

tengah campak-campak ramuan..match-match je sudey...(A+B mungkin akan menghasilkan rasa ini!! campur!) aku dengar mak aku gelak-gelak...rupanya tengah tengok mamat hensem kat TV...chef berwajah pan asian..bonusnya..dia tak lembut seperti chef-chef lelaki lain...aha!

punya la aku timing baik punya masak setelkan nasik tu...nak tunggu sampai end rancangan..nak tengok nama chef...

sherson lian nama dia... (google aaa muka dia..tak koser aku nak letak sini..tapi kalau google..banyak blog stok tangkap syok sama dia...)

aku tengok tak kelakar pon...dia tripping je..dia lambung-lambung makanan ke...nape mak aku gelak ni???

hujung-hujung..aku macam tak paham sangat..aku pon menyuarakan rasa hati...

"tak kelakar pon...apsal gelak?"

mak aku tak jawab...dia buat macam aku tak pernah tanya pape jee...nasik pon dah siap masak....terus lupa kisah chef kacak tadi..

"kalo kita malas-malas next time, kita boleh masak camni..."

'kita' sangat....

lepas tu abang ngan bapak aku join skali...dorang punya makan...padahal baru lepas balik kenduri...aku masak sedap kot~ (mati la berperangsangka begini..)

oh...kisah chef tadi...aku rasa mak aku suka orang hensem...WTH conclusion aku gini? aku tak paham taste dia...dia pon tak paham taste aku jugak..masalah nya sekarang...aku tak sure aku ada taste ke tak...

tapi...ada apa dengan lelaki kacak? kalau aku rasa tak lawak..tetap tak lawak... -__-

tu blom kisah orang tanya favourite character...one of the boyfriends got emotional when he asked who i like the most in twilight..my answer = Jasper Hale...

tak paham? aku pon tak paham.

*mak aku cakap aku masak semua tawar...lepas tu selamba aku jawab..mak masak semua masin...
sian mak aku ada anak cam aku..haih...

- E N D -

Monday, October 22, 2012

superstar K4

not a big fan of kpop nor korean song

but cant stop playing this one...

tak pasal pasal..




i like it first time i heard it...

roy kim had a better proper look..but this jung joon young..seriously..kelakar rasa nak lempang...





- E N D -

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Jodoh.Bodoh.

Bermula dengan cerita perihal pinggan mangkuk yang mahal nak mam...

Tiba-tiba....

'Handsome dia Na..macam Aaron Aziz...family ok..bagus auntie nampak budaknya..bla..bla..bla...' (dah tak concentrate lepas tu..boleh nampak kawan aku melemparkan muka simpati kat aku yang terpaksa dengar)

Rasa macam dah habis kempen...
Air dah nak seteko diminum...
Perut dah nak kembung...

'Gua tak minat Aaron Aziz...' bangun dan blah...

Diorang rasa aku kena mandi bunga. Kawan aku tatau nak gelak ke nak sokong aku or mak dia.

Kalau gua smoker..sure gua lari keluar rumah merokok bajet bajet menenangkan otak...

Tapi end up duduk depan jauh sikit dari kumpulan manusia manusia tadi...

Kawan datang cakap..'tell me about it'

Aku jawab.. 'ko nak dengar apa yang ko nak dengar ke nak dengar apa yang aku nak cakap?'

Aaron Aziz?????? Seriously?????!!!

*menyampah.meluat.
**ramai betul auntie-auntie ni jumpa 'Aaron Aziz'.. confuse!

E.N.D
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Saturday, October 20, 2012

semua itu ketentuan-Nya

19102012

kita merancang..Dia yang tentukan...

Farah Farhana Haron

tahniah untuk phd anda

takziah atas pemergian ayahanda anda

*aku tau semua terjadi cepat gila..tapi ko kena kuat..aku taknak suruh kau sabar...aku nak suruh kau kuat!

- E N D -

Friday, October 19, 2012

white collagen

this is not a product promotion entry... nor cynical entry about certain people's obsession of getting fairer...

this entry is just going to be a plain babbling of mine....

i've been struggling with sleeping disorder lately...but not as bad as before where i only slept after two days being awake...

so last night...i slept quite early..right after Isyak..praying while you're sleepy was seriously...challenging...

due to that early 'knock out'...i was up as early...at 4 am...actually i was already up at 1 am...but successfully forcing myself to sleep back...after several time asyik terbangun.. at 4 am..i finally gave up and woke up...

i carried on with the 'arranging' routine....yeah..i never satisfied with the room arrangement...

and since arranging thingy seems like its going to take forever...i stopped and start surfing the internet...i went through the FB timeline...and surprise to see these ads 'getting fairer product' everywhere... and from that..i can see how obsess people in Malaysia to get fair...

it is not really right for me to speak about this matter...(i am quite fair myself...i mean...quite fair for a Malay)..it is as not right as when the most beautiful people on earth said she rather be just cool than beautiful...simple as that!

that's not the point anyway...i remember a discussion with the lecturer and some student during my ADR meeting...we discuss about how we never happy about ourselves..(theres a term to this that i can't recall)...i was one of the subject we discuss... i am quite tall for an asian female..i am fairer to be just Malay..(and apparently fairer in Launceston...probably due to the weather) i did have issue with certain facilities..like chairs..doors..table counter...and certain other things that is measured base on asian measurement... ergonomic failure i must say...

we discussed aboout skin colour as well...and my lecturer is actually half indian..although she looked perfectly white...once she said she'd actually half indian...that indian figure can be seen automatically...she told us about how obsessed the indian want to be fair where they bleached themselves..and i swiftly respond..'owh..in malaysia..they bleached themselves too'... and she said she just didn't get the point why people try too hard to change their skin colour...

one of the classmates said..'we want to get tan..they want to get fair..simple!'

the conclusion we made that day was...we will never satisfied...the fair want to be tan...the tan want to get  fair...

we always got this idea of...maybe i look good the other way....like if im tanner.. fairer.. skinnier.. chubbier.. etc... etc...

how far its true? it depends on your idea of BETTER..seriously...

*right after the class...i accompanied my friend to choose tan colour for his skin...he said he needs to look great for the mardi gras... because he thought he might look better tan..and all i said was..'this colour make you look like walking carrot and this colour make you look like an alive statue' ..yes..i didn't help much.

- E N D -

Thursday, October 18, 2012

tipu

baru sekejap suka
terus datang duka
kalau dulu aku pujuk diri cakap tak apa
kini aku sedar semua itu dusta

siapa yang kau tipu?

mereka kah?
bukan diri sendiri?

bertahan untuk hidup
atau
melawan untuk hidup
?


mungkin kah terlalu sibuk meneliti jalan yang dipijak hingga lupa untuk mendongak?

- E N D -

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Art Friend and me...

i never drew before..i mean..in Malaysia...

so..im a bit clueless where to find art stuff...so..i tweeted my question on where can i buy plain canvas in KL...and few had respond.

i went for canvas hunting just now...and after browsing for the shop that sell art stuff.. i finally decided to go to Art Friend at the Gardens...there were some other places as well..but..since i went hunting alone...i chose a place that i think 'safe' for a loner... i was expecting expensive price for everything...surprise enough that almost everything is at a reasonable price...maybe because i was converting everything i bought to AUD...so i find canvas here in Malaysia were cheaper..and had a better quality...

they had many art stuff....crafty thingy...thank God they don't have fabric....or else...maybe aku tak keluar-keluar dari kedai tu.....so all and all...i like the shop..and would recommend others who seek for any art stuff to go there...it's at the 3rd floor...located a bit hidden at the corner...anything you need...from model making to cross stitch..(yeah...i can't see the relationship between model n cross stitch too..)

i am sure the staff serabut tengok aku pusing kedai tu berpuluh kali..sebab aku pon rasa penat...haha...

tak kisah la tu...but Art Friend is now one of my favourite shop...

and akhirnya duduk berehat di starbucks and tengok semua orang tak masuk2 office.. padahal lunch hour dah habis dalam 30 minit...or maybe semua orang 'meeting' kat midvalley???


* semua best..yang tak best..brush mahal haram...stress!
**banyak betul entry aku hari ni!

- E N D -

makan makan makan

1.30 pagi

aku tengah pikir pasal makanan...

stress dengan diri sendiri..

excited dah nak pegi cari canvas esok.

tapi lokasi kedai....err....tempat yang banyak kedai makan...

yang aku and kawan-kawan selalu la jugak makan-makan...
(hujung bulan terus jadi BFF ngn pakcik, makcik, abang, kakak kat section 2..kalau tak makan nak mewah je! )

kalau kat Aussie/Launnie makan sorang macam takde hal ... (sebab majoriti makan sorang)

kat sini..makan sorang orang tengok2...terus tak boleh focus aku nak makan... WTH??!!

oke..kau nak cari canvas ke cari makan?

teringat dulu kalau gi mid sure makan yoshinoya...tak pon kedai ape ntah bebudak danau mas ni suka makan kat corner atas tu? yang korang kata bubur pulut hitam dia sedap tu?

aku tak paham kenapa yoshinoya tutup. bankrupt eh?

aku ingat cukup dah aku kayakan diorang.

oke..focus! canvas!

- E N D -

nickname sangat...

my friend called just now..just to tell me how he hate his nickname now..

oke..to cut it short...i have quite a number of male friends who were and still be called as 'bi'...some i know where they got that name..and some don't..

so...this friend of mine...we called him 'wan' before everyone started to call him bi...

this is how it started...

this friend of mine used to 'nganjing' me separuh gila when he heard some of my friends 'dear' me...walaupon berkali-kali aku cakap..aku bukan rusa (deer)..they just won't stop...and thank God..now almost all of em had their own 'deer'.... and he used to menganjeng every lovey-dovey couple on earth yang guna all these lovey dovey names...bi..yang..yayang..kanda..dinda..etc...etc...

so..this hanjingan stops when his girlfriend came join us...and i am quite close to the GF as well... i heard her call him bi...and he addressed himself as bi too....

maka...mentol atas kepala terus menyala...history hanjingan macam aku sorang sahaja yang tahu... i 'bi' him...semudah ABC...lepas 'bi' ..gelak seperti perempuan gila... GF lek je sebab paham aku pon bermulut longkang...dan hanjengan itu tidak bermakna apa-apa...

yang aku tak paham..tiba-tiba..yang jantan-jantan lain pon sekali 'bi' kan dia...bila aku tanya...'ko panggil dia bi knapa plak?' jawapan mudah... 'dah ko panggil'.. T___T

maka bi sudah tidak manja lagi bagi wan...weh..aku prektis panggil ko wan balik aaaa...tapi ko kena toleh bila aku panggil kau!

maka...kepada lin...mungkin ko kena cari nama lain untuk 'bi'...tu dah jadi nama commercial dia...ampunkan aku...aku tatau asal usul bi tu...hubby ke...baby ke...biar la jadi rahsia korang berdua..muahahha...yg pasti En.Syazwan cakap..bila aku panggil dia bi...dia rasa aku membabikan dia... gua tak kejam macam tu bro...hahaaha...

aku  paham perasaan kau wan...aku panggil ko wan balik..siyes aku tak tipu...tapi kang bunyi mcm special sangat plak tetiba aku sorang panggil kau wan... -___-

kepada rakan-rakan di luar sana yang tak suka nickname anda...terima kasih kerana memaklumkan ketidak senangan hati anda...saya sedia memanggil nama yang anda prefer...(nama betol korang aaaa...tetiba kau nak suruh aku panggil kau ayang ke..anje je..memang meja aku baling...)

kepada rakan-rakan yang melekat nama korang...terima kasih kerana tidak kisah...takde sape pon tahu history di sebalik nickname cool korang tu kan? hahaha...

*ada cikgu practical time sekolah rendah panggil aku liana...sampai sudah aku tak pandang...esoknya dia cakap aku sombong... T__T

** ada cikgu ni panggil aku leeya...nama kami sama...birthdate kami sama...BFF dia panggil dia leeya katanyaa...kawan-kawan panggil dia yana...so..dia panggil aku leeya..(aku pon tak paham kaitan itu)anto surat pon tulis leeya..time tu aku rasa macam baca surat orang....apakah?

*** di Launceston...ada yang pernah minta kebenaran nak panggil aku Miss Na...dan bila aku cut my name short..sebab dorang tak dapat2 nama aku...(kunang tu dah mudah aku rasa) selamba je dorang tanya..."so..you're French?"

blom lagi soalan 'you're from here...??' bukan sekali...berkali kali...bukan calang-calang orang..dalam kapal terbang...time sembang dengan strangers..student advisor juga...(mungkin kah aku berwajah seperti omputih...ptuih!) sampai kadang-kadang aku rasa offended bila ditanya soalan tu..

tapi paling tak tahan...you're from mongo? T____T (lari ke bucu bilik nangis sedu sedan)

- E N D -

Saturday, October 13, 2012

glad to help

i wish i could share what had been written in the card..but i think it just too personal to be shared publicly.... 


i did nothing...most of the time i listen...and the hospist said... that is what he need at this moment...a willing listener... 

the worst part is to know that the hope is false hope...

O Allah...give him strength he needs...



so many things had been shared...this is his favourite song.
i don't want to care what the others thought about him..because i know..i have a lot of good stories to tell one day...


- E N D -

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

easier said than done

kan?

- E N D -

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

gila tak rindu!

 

 - E N D -

Monday, October 8, 2012

impression..penting ke?

kisah doctor

dialog 2 ketul manusia ...

first time jumpa..
A : smart nye dia
B : ko boh dia dlm baggy pants...t-shirt lusuh..'smar't sangat weyh...

second time jumpa...without uniform...
A : dia dah tak smart (sedih bebeno)
B : Hi! (sambil menuju ke arah doctor tadi)

kisah architect

usha sana sini...tak kira smart, kemas, selekeh.

compem ada satu part yg ada architect nya. (memang hanya architect yang tahu)
yang selekeh tak semestinya ngok...yang smart tak semestinya bestari.

sama kisahnya dengan doctor tadi.

*aku sendiri pernah meragui kebolehan rakan sendiri di wad kecemasan sebab time dia tak jadi doctor sama-sama tongong berfoya-foya...cemas semasa menyerahkan kawan yang cedera kepada kawan doctor... haih!

aku tahu ko sure tak bajet aku boleh serious time presentation.

- E N D -

Sunday, October 7, 2012

redhakan aku merapu

serious...sekarang ni tiba-tiba rasa nak membebel...mungkin setelah berhari-hari aku bercakap merapu tanpa henti...tengkiu kak nadd dengar saya merapu..saya tahu akak tak rela...tapi kalau lari sure saya sentap..muahaha...

owh...i received two phone calls from Launceston...hoi..!!! rindu Launnie weyh..pecer kau Kunang?? tak town langsung! bergayut lama tak hengat macam Launceston sebelah rumah...ye..ai tahu u'olls rindu ai...dah lama kan tak dapat cakap banyak-banyak non stop..hahaha...ai rindu monash girl jugak...time-time emo rasa melampau-lampau rindunya...sure la video raya kita yang gempak tu ditonton berulang-ulang..haha...

well anyway...esok ke KK pulak...so hopefully lancar perjalanan...walaupon tak habis pack lagi...penat singapore tak habis lagi...trip paling penat so far...sebab penat sampai tak boleh tidur...sakit badan..rasa nak muntah...dan macam-macam rasa kurang enak lagi...(kak nadd kata ianya faktor usia...damn! gua rasa gua muda lagi...)

tu pon kalau ikut kepala gila...mungkin dah keluar layan resident evil...naseb baik masih rasional berfikir dan ingat..next trip ke KK bukan trip mudah... kesan 'goncangan' roller coaster masih tak habis..kau dah pikir next destination bersuka ria? isk isk isk... tapi kak nadd...you are one of my best crazy partner in crime...naik roller coaster macam takde hal...boleh sembang masalah negara time tengah ride...selamba! pikir-pikir balik...nasib baik takde DNA...kalau tak compem badan lebam-lebam...kalau ada DNA..mustahil la kita naik mende alah tu seround je... -___-"

owh..tadi tengok aku kau dan tong sampah..haaaa..ai suka beto....kbai! bukan amir haikal...oke la..suka la watak tu sipi-sipi...tapi lagi minat beto...pandainya kau berlakon! (macam something wrong ak entry aku ni?)

owh...hari ni, ada lagi sesi mari berbincang tentang jodoh bersama warga-warga lebih matang...tak reti dah aku nak respond...rasa macam nak buat  tender terbuka...'mari pinang saya?' or mungkin aku patut selamba menjawab aku tak laku?tak ada siapa yang nak pon? (kasar bahasa ni terhadap diri sendiri) soalan yang paling tak boleh terima pastilah 'it's only a joke question' meragui benarkah aku berminat terhadap lelaki...

ni kerajaan aaa ni...asal bestfriend ngn pompuan je lesbian...asal lelaki pakai v-neck gay...susah la gini...aku ok je lelaki nak pakai baju pink ke hape ke...tapi bila bawak handbag pompuan memang aku rasa nak lempang kekadang tu...tapi..ada apa hal...?

mungkin aku patut selamba je cakap kat mamat mana-mana aku pernah crush ajak kawen kalau dia single lagi...pffftttt....lepas tu? sape yang happy? dorang aaa bajet bajet happy..aku??? oh...dorang bukan happy...tapi dorang boleh move on to the next question...'bila nak ada anak ni?' T___T

rimas adalah 'sejata' paling berkesan untuk paksa aku membuat keputusan...sebab nak tunggu aku risau...memang anjing bertanduk, ayam mengiau.

!

- E N D -

Saturday, October 6, 2012

just got back...and i can't wait until tomorrow to write about this

hi!

i just got back from Singapore..

i just finished unpack everything..and i should have rest and have my beauty sleep now...

but..

i just feel the urge of producing this entry..

this is not really a book review...it just another thought from me about stuff i think i should share with the world.



i bought this just now while waiting for the flight to Kuala Lumpur from Singapore...although i had my kindle with me...that  won't stop me from buying book/s.. -___-"

i just couldn't stop myself from buying books...and apparently...in Changi Airport...they had an awesome collection on the rack...(it's seem impossible to me not to buy one...seriously)

i told my friend about one of the book i read while browsing the rack...(Nora surprised me with the book... thank you...i seriously love the book! it's inspiring...!!)



i even talked to strangers at  the bookshop and said that i like the book..and he should have it... =p
(well..he asked for an opinion anyway...)

i would like to blog about the steal like an artist book...as a person who involved in art world..i would suggest everyone to read it..buy..borrow..steal...or do whatever it takes to get yourself to read the book...everyone should read this book...i haven't research about this book yet..(i mean, to see what others have to say about it)..but i personally love it...it's my new self motivation book...(after living architecture by peter zumthor)...the way he wrote the book is just, so honest...it's like reading my own notes about myself...(some part of it look like my Design Research Method notes)...and the best  part is to read about Wilson Mizner.."if you copy from one author, it's plagiarism, but if you copy from many, it's research." i had that quote written in my notebook (which i carry where ever i go)...and quite surprise to see it written in the book...

he wrote about the 'unread library'...and that part make me feel less guilty to myself for not yet reading all the books i had on rack... =P

after reading the book...i think i can tick 9 out of 10 tips...and the most important thing that i learn after reading it, is to love what i do...to appreciate stuff i did...and it's definitely okay to fail..

i realize that i can't live without art...because i love it so much that sometimes it annoyed me... point no.5...'side projects and hobbies are important'...seriously..i can't agree more on this point...i know that i am not good at painting...but painting help me forget about my work..and it helps me to concentrate and generate fresh ideas after struggling doing all the 'killing' task...i don't do it for money, popularity, or marks...i do it for self satisfaction..i'm happy with the result and i don't care if it look stupid...i am happy to share and show it...

i love music because i think it is the best medium that i can use to make a new friends..i read everything because i always curious about everything..i like a lot of thing..but i only collect stuff that i really like....

i don't want to be a spoiler here...

but i am happy to recommend whoever had read this entry to read

STEAL LIKE AN ARTIST by Austin Kleon..

the book had somehow help me understand myself... and i'll make sure i write a fan letter to the person who had inspired me...(read the book and you'll understand..)

*i love almost everything about the book. and hey Austin. we share the same horoscope!!

- E N D -

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

nasihat

rumah jiran dimasuki pencuri/perompak sewaktu mereka pulang ke kampung..dikhuatiri orang dalam juga subahatnya..rasa nak pitam bila polis kata kemungkinan besar siang terjadinya kejadian.. sebab aku ada di sana tolong check suis yang katanya lupa ditutup di garage belakang...tolong betulkan peti surat yang senget juga sambil dikutip semua suratnya...

patut lah tengah malam semalam ditelefon..aku selamba cakap semua orang dah tidur..tanpa bertanya mengapa...(lampi)

perlu buang tabiat..kalau orang tak cerita..aku  tak mahu tanya...

tapi..

alhamdulillah..masih dilindung Allah...

hari selasa rasa macam hari minggu...
sekali lagi...words from them for me to ponder...

"rasanya Kunang mampu membuatnya bercakap...dan mendengar..."
motif?

aku kata mereka terlalu yakin.
sudah jadi beban.

mungkin aku akan pergi dan duduk di bucu bilik memerhati sambil membaca komik Doraemon.

- E N D -

tak nak itu jawapan yang pasti

gua dah cakap gua hanya akan jadi pengapit/maids kalau pengantin tu sama tinggi dengan gua or lagi tinggi dari gua...

lu nak tengok orang tengok gua je nanti? pffftttt... ayat dahagakan pelempang..atau kaki layaknya?

flaneur? 
tidak.
dan
ya.


- E N D -

Monday, October 1, 2012

so...its KL - Ipoh - KL - Singapore - KL - KK - KL - Ipoh - KL

okay...jadual penuh mengalahkan menteri...aku pon tak paham situasi ini...belum habis semua lagi..baru KL- Ipoh - KL..

balik kampung berjumpa sanak saudara kini bukan lagi satu perkara mudah....kalau dulu balik kampung...takde kazen...seorang diri, pergi kejar ayam atau menjahanamkan segala pokok bunga hasil tanaman arwah nenek dan atuk pon dah cukup untuk menghilangkan rasa bosan..apatah lagi kalau togel pokok bunga, daun, bunga, ranting kecik-kecik...semua selamba je aku cabut...lepas tu dapat setepek penampor...yeah...sakit.. tapi rasa puas hati menghasilkan satu 'masterpiece' melihat musnahnya pokok-pokok tu aku kerjakan...tiada tandingannya dengan tamparan yang diterima...time memusnah seronok tak terhingga...bila tersedar dari keseronokan...panic rasa macam nak buat drama melayu mintak hampun...(seronok petik-petik.. T__T)

ya..

merepek.

selain daripada 'bertikam lidah' dengan pakcik-pakcik tercinta...tiada lagi hiburan lain...tak tahu 'term' apa yang patut diguna...sebab dengan anak sedara lain..sopan kemain pakcik aku yang sorang ni...dengan aku..hamboih...gurauan kasar...kalau orang tak tengok siapa yang bercakap..sure ingat pompuan yang sure macam jantan..tengah bercakap ngan kawan lelaki yang kepochi..haih...mujur dunia arkitek banyak mengajar aku kasar itu hanya sekadar 'terma' walaupon serba sedikit aku tahu..kasar itu sudah agak sebati dalam diri...

pakcik gua kata dia yakin gua kental...gila kentang statement...lepas tu selamba ajak aku pegi test drive..cerita pasal kereta..3 series...c class..e class..bla...bla...bla....projek sana sini...cita pasal tanah bagai... aku tatau nak angguk ke geleng...aku tak paham kenapa dorang boleh libatkan aku dalam sesi 'sembang rakyat' mereka ni... aku tatau aku yang kepochi atau dorang yang kepochi... atau aku anak saudara kegemaran mereka? haaaaa.....hahahha...

tapi nyata aku sedar aku lebih fussy sekarang...bila berkeputusan...susah nya nak tukar pendirian...bila nak makan..semua tak kena..(tapi badan naik je..don't get me wrong)...

bila ditanya kenapa tak makan..susah aku nak cakap...owh..tak makan itu..tak makan ini...sadis kehidupan begini....bila ditanya..kalo laki kamu esok nak makan mende2 tu camne?

jawapan seronok : sape cakap gua nak kawen?
(ok..kata ganti diri yang lebih sopan dan manja telah digunakan..ptuih..)

hamik kau.

sentap seisi rumah...tersedak kazen tahan gelak..pakcik gua? tiba-tiba tuka topic..cerita pasal model helicopter dia..pasal gadget...bla bla bla....

sape lagi mahu tanya?

kadang-kadang aku serious rasa diorang lupa aku perempuan...

 "korang sembang apa tadi? jarang benar nak dengar dia bercakap banyak."

apa aku nak jawab? dah orang nak cakap..takkan aku nak kata STOP! kang aku cakap aku ada kuasa bagi semua orang yang tak mahu bercakap jadi bercakap...aku berkemampuan membuat manusia menceritakan kisah-kisah yang tak sepatutnya mereka cerita...haaa..bunyi nak hebat...nampak sangat fictionnya.... haih...kadang-kadang aku nak start perbualan pon aku tak tau mana mula..maka terjadi lah cerita model helicopter..aktiviti pomen mempomen enjin model helicopter mahu pon kereta...activiti mengutuk parti-parti politik..aktiviti bercerita pasal masalah awek.balak.anak.bapak.mak.mak sedara.pak sedara.mak mertua.pak mertua.ipar duai.biras.beras.dan banyak lagi parti yang terlibat.

manusia ialah makhluk yang kompleks. sebab aku sendiri rasa diri sendiri kompleks melihat mereka yang kompleks.

banyak benda dalam kepala...kalau boleh di erase..memang aku erase mende-mende semak dalam kepala ni.

SEMAK.

- E N D -

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

rindu anak orang


tengah susun file..terjumpa gamba ni..taken last year...ammar belum ada lagi..dah besar dah budak-budak ni...tengok video lagi laaa..its impossible not to miss them...

haih...

owh..few days before, ter tengok video nora buat time nak balik raya last year...owh those days...

- E N D -

we're ok..my friend said so

i've been discussing about these conservative and liberal thingy with ska the other day...

and she said that she read somewhere...

when the liberal think that you're too conservative...
and
the conservative think that you are too liberal to be conservative..

it shows that you're okay...
(aku rasa kita pelik..tak diterima masyarakat gini weyh..hahha...)

*a friend texted me just to say hi...teringat katanya lepas tengok witch yoo hee...
aku pon tengok kat youtube...rasa nak bunuh diri terus.. T__T
kbai!

- E N D -

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

hidup

today's entry will be about life...

lately..aku banyak terima berita orang sakit...
sakit ni kan bermusim...time denggi..semua orang kena denggi..time heart attack..banyak gila berita heart attack..tapi macam tu la kisah hidup aku...satu start...bertimpa-timpa datang...

ok...lately ni...aku rasa aku banyak terima kisah orang sakit kanser...kanser ni bukan baru dalam hidup aku...kadang-kadang aku rasa menyesal tak jadi doctor...aicheh...aku ada ramai orang yang terdekat dengan aku yang menghidap kanser...like seriously...ramai...tapi belum lebih sepuluh orang la..tu pon kalau aku tak silap kira or tak miss sape-sape...

bila ada ahli keluarga yang sakit...bukan sahaja orang yang sakit tu diuji kesabarannya...orang yang terdekat dengan si sakit tadi juga diuji kesabaran nya menempuh, menghadapi, menjaga dan memastikan everything falls in the right place...

ni entry ni aku tulis takde research ke hape...tapi..seriously...aku nak tahu sangat punca kanser..kenapa ramai sangat yang kena??

time tulis ni perasaan aku bercampur baur...sedih..hiba..semua ada..aku akan teringat balik mereka-mereka yang telah pergi dan yang masih lagi suffer...berat aku menengoknya...tapi macam mana sedih pon aku..berat lagi bahu yang memikul...takde perkataan lain boleh diucap melainkan sabar...duit dah tak penting..kalau penyakit tak boleh diubat... sokongan... shoulder to cry on...telinga yang sanggup mendengar tanpa sibuk menjudging..itu lebih berharga...

teringat pada seorang studiomate yang propose cancer centre for kids.. masa dia explain kat  aku..aku boleh nampak air mata dia bertakung...muka steady je...lepas semua orang dah blaaa...aku tanya, dia cerita...sbb sepanjang zaman kanak-kanak dia..dia teman abang dia kat hospital sebab cancer...and..aku boleh cakap...aku tak paham sepenuhnya situasi dia...tapi aku boleh rasa sedihnya..aku pernah hilang kawan sebab cancer masa umur 8 tahun macam tu...masa tu rasa macam tipu sangat...tiba-tiba dia dah tak boleh berjalan..bercakap....

punca aku tulis entry ni..ialah untuk mengingatkan diri sendiri...beribadah selagi mampu..kerja selagi boleh..bahagia kan mereka yang pernah kita rasa nak bahagiakan selagi terdaya...jangan pernah putus asa dalam mengubati apa-apa jua...sebab memang semua penyakit ada ubatnya kecuali mati...usaha...everyone deserves to be happy...

*terjumpa seseorang yang dahulunya cergas..tapi kini berjalan pon dah perlahan...jika tidak disapanya...memang aku dah tak kenal siapa dia...bila dia senyum..aku rasa nak pengsan sebab sedih yang teramat sangat...

**ada saudara yang sakit bertanya... ramai yang mula kata..pergi...mungkin dia ada nak cakap apa-apa..sebab dulunya..sewaktu dia refuse untuk bercakap dengan semua orang...dia nak bercakap dengan aku...berjam lamanya berbicara...sampai ada topic yang aku rasa aku tak perlu tahu...tak kurang juga yang hairan mengapa aku yang dipilih untuk dia bercerita...(hati kecil berkata..Allah aturkan segalanya..)

***persoalannya...mampukah aku...?? boleh tak aku menangis sepuasnya dahulu baru pergi bertemu muka..takut aku tak mampu nak buka mulut sebab sibuk tahan air mata...

#ini semua kisah pesakit kanser...by  the time aku habis tulis ni...total yang aku kira-kira...adalah lebih sepuluh...Allah...Ya Allah...peliharalah kami...



- E N D -

Sunday, September 23, 2012

rasa

beribu kali

aku lemas,
aku rimas.

beratus kali

dalam otak kau dilemaskan,
dalam otak konon nya si buku dah berjumpa dengan ruas.

tak pernah berhenti

tepi kain sibuk 'terjaga' tanpa dicari,
tak kurang yang seronok mahu 'menulis' ceritera orang lain dari diri sendiri.

puluhan kali

nasihat bernas didengari,
menusuk sanubari.

boleh dikira dengan jari

yang boleh dipercayai,
yang paling cantik pada dirinya ialah hati.



- E N D -

Saturday, September 22, 2012

miss me?

i miss those journeys..

i miss us...
and 
you..you..and you...!

*yeah i know i sound so gay already... T___T
mati laaa...

- E N D -

Friday, September 21, 2012

they asked.. i answered..

the only 'make up' i own the time they asked me ...

colourless clinnelle lip balm...

so what?

topic paling hangat sekarang...KAHWIN...#bersepah aku muntah.

- E N D -

Thursday, September 20, 2012

kerana mulut badan binasa

lain yang dimaksudkan..lain pulak yang dipahamnya...dengan seronoknya..dia berkata.."tu ahh...asyik makan je..."

fine...!!! aku nak pegi daftar The Biggest Loser next season!!!

*soalannya...pernah pulak aku kurus kan?? ptuih!

buat-buat termotivate...



ni aqilah post kat  FB dia...beliau merupakan pekerja McD yang berdedikasi di Launceston...sejak kerja McD..hari-hari dia cakap fast food ssangat tidak sihat..mari makan pizza kat Delorraine katanya.. =O
 (ni mmg badan binasa abes...tengah tulis ni pon terasa-rasa kat tekak kesedapan pizza itu..hadoi...T__T)



- E N D -

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

yang mereka tahu dan tidak tahu

now Kunang had too much time on her hands, which she had begun to find was bad thing. too much time meant that she started thinking, and when she started thinking, she found she wasn't thinking particularly happy thoughts.

yup..i know its weird to see me addressing me like that....

i spoke to two of my girlfriends yesterday...and i finally feel a bit relieved...like seriously relief!

and kak nadd...if something weird happen...don't hesitate to talk to my mum about it...hahaha...

to a'ai...aku rasa..tanggapan kau terlalu positif....

i think kak nadd was quite right...that just so not not me too sound like that..ha!

i found myself seriously annoyed with people who are not punctual...meluat melampau tak tipu punya...

i hate it when people looking down towards others...so..sape-sape rasa nak mengumpat ngan aku...pikir panjang-panjang..aku memang bermulut longkang...tapi merendahkan orang tak bawak kau ke mana...*emo* ingat sikit...kita ada saudara mara lain...maybe akan ada anak sendiri..kau nak ke orang cakap macam tu pasal anak kau?

tak kurang jugak yang sibuk meninggi diri...

yang sibuk aku tak kahwin kahwin lagi....*yang ni serious kadang-kadang aku rasa nak lemaskan manusia-manusia ni dalam lombong...lagi tak tahan kalau anak dia pon tak kawen lagi...dah..kau sibuk aku plak tak kawen???

yang sibuk memaksa...mungkin ramai yang tak tahu...aku lagi disuruh..lagi aku akan say NO...lagi dikempen..lagi aku meluat...so..sekarang paham kan kenapa aku takleh masuk politik?

yang tak paham 'language' aku...ye....aku tak boleh expect semua orang faham aku...tapi bila aku dah kata tak nak tu...sila lah paham...jangan sampai aku menjadi biadap...

i am hell conservative...ni memang mampus orang tak percaya...tapi..yang kenal selalunya paham...betapa 'kolot' nya aku dalam kehidupan...

jangan dicabar kedegilan aku...dah tak wujud perempuan kerak nasi zaman sekarang ni...

muka batu hati daun kata mereka...

aku kata

muka batu...hati boleh jadi daun beracun.

kau mampu?

- E N D -

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

berlari dan terus berari...

dah tiba masa tengok siapa yang tertinggal kat belakang tu...boleh tengok je aaaa...

*serabut : aisyah mokhtar, selain jep..ko dah tahu apa yg boleh menyerabutkan aku..hahaha...

guts : zero

kbai!

- E N D -

Saturday, September 15, 2012

tempayan vs longkang

this entry would be about people we called si mulut longkang dan si mulut tempayan.

i always wonder macam mana simpulan bahasa mulut tempayan tu wujud...seriously...how eh?

to be honest... i hate both...the tempayans and the longkangs...but being a 'longkang' myself...i can't say  i hate the longkangs...butsurely..being a longkang never do you good...you hurt others feeling by saying something ruthless and mean...

time ni...betullah..lidah lebih tajan dari pisau...

and these longkangs usually..theres 2 type of longkangs...(yeah..i made up the category myself..~)

longkang kering yang hanya busuk bila hari hujan

and

longkang yang tak pernah kering

longkang kering ni mulut laser...sakit hati btau depan-depan..lepas tu habis kat situ jugak..dia nak sentap..dia sentap sorang-sorang...sebab bagi dia..takde sape pon tahu sakit nya hati dia kalau dia tak bagitahu...kata-kata belakang tak main...tapi bila berdepan..mulut dia la yang paling laser...

longkang basah...keji gila...kadang-kadang berbau..kadang-kadang tidak...depan laser...belakang cerita tak habis jugak...or kadang-kadang depan bajet-bajet oke..(almaklum...time ni longkang tak berbau sampah)..belakang tiba-tiba menjadi keji...

KEJI...dua-dua pon KEJI...tapi longkang basah lebih keji...

mulut tempayan...takkan pernah berubah...willl remain tempayan..wangi ke busuk ke isinya...fungsinya sama... bukannya dia sedar isi dia tu boleh membawa mudarat kepada yang mengambilnya...

so...this tempayan people..selagi boleh elak...i will definitely elak...

tapi sama je..perspective manusia lain-lain...bila terlalu mudah berkongsi rahsia...dikeji...bila telalu reserved..pon dikeji...

tepuk dada..goncang otak...tanya diri...

*metafora apakah ini?

- E N D -

Friday, September 14, 2012

pembantu rumah pon berevolusi?

rasa macam dah selalu gila tulis pasal pembantu rumah ni...dari gaji RM350..sekarang dah RM700-RM800...bersih!

makan minum tanggung..elektrik..air..apa saja keperluan la....tak pakai rasa perlu...pakai serabut...

ok...saya hanyalah anak kepada majikan...bukan majikan...

mungkin ramai yang akan cakap...kenapa kau tak bua sendiri kerja rumah kau?

soalan ini sama bangangnya dengan kenapa kau hantar si polan ke hospital swasta? hospital kerajaan kan ada..

or..

laaa..kenapa tak claim insurans...

*teremosi sebentar...

selaagi belum pernah pakai kasut orang yang dikata...jangan sibuk mengajar orang tersebut berjalan lebih pantas...atau lebih tepat lagi...kalau setakat pernah pakai kasut dia..tapi tak pernah berjalan sebatu guna kasut tu..senyap lagi bagus!

oke...kembali kepada issue pembantu rumah...bila adanya pembantu rumah yang memberontak...maka.. sedikit rasa racist timbul..(sila jangan amalkan ini!) bila mereka menetapkan kerja apa yang mereka mahu buat...(buat pon ala kadar...memang lepas batuk di tangga habis..)gaji kalau boleh nak naik tiap-tiap bulan...handphone sentiasa ada di pocket..baju..nak bergaya saja...hoiii....tinggi nya maintenance kau...

bila baju raya bibik lagi mahal dari baju anak majikan...bila 'baju kerja' bibik lagi 'style' dari anak majikan...kau nak sapu sampah pon nak pakai seluar slack? (serabut aku bila mak aku cerita).. tu belum cerita...'saya tidur mesti kena bukak lampu terang-terang'...or setiap kali beli barang rumah...tangan diorang lagi cepat...capai shampoo...capai body wash..lotion bagai...

lepasan diploma kita..nak dapat RM2000 pon seksa...starting yg RM1300 pon aku pernah dengar kat KL ni...yang luar KL...RM 1000 pon pernah...baik kau pergi jadi bibik...makan pakai orang tanggung...tak payah perah otak...tak payah jawab exam...takde dosa terngumpat lecturer...bayar yuran uni/college...bayar sewa rumah...minyak kereta..hujung sem puasa ramai-ramai sebab duit dah di hujung nyawa....

oke..baik jadi bibik! ko buat keje rumah...elok ke tak...gaji tetap jalan...gaji 100% kau punya..yang lain-lain..biar majikan kau pikir...

aku rasa benda-benda macam ni la buat rakyat Malaysia tak happy...
ye..memang la akan ada yang cakap..kalau tak mampu jangan pakai pembantu rumah...bela sendiri anak tu..hanta nursey...

lagi sekali....

kasut sape yang kau pakai tu....????

rasanya dulu orang dah pernah mengamuk pasal gaji bibik-bibik ni naik melampau-lampau sangat...actually..kalau gaji kita sekali naik takde sape kecoh pon...

kesimpulannya...kerajaan WAJIB buat sesuatu untuk menggembirakan hati rakyat...kurang kurangkan la korupsi...or else...sila plan main kotor baik punya kalau nak menang next election!

* bengang pada pembantu rumah kerajaan disalahkan...ape kes?

- E N D -

Thursday, September 13, 2012

tudung


fun kan mamat ni? haih..nampak la ke-stress-an blaja architecture...sian..takpe dik..sabar..bertahan...ahkak tiap-tiap hari rasa nak terjun dari batman bridge (salah satu bridge yg hensem di TAS) sebab menyesal sket-sket amik course archi...

so..nape duduk tak duduk aku nak tulis pasal issue tudung?

ye..saya seorang perempuan dan bertudung...
tidak dinafikan semua perempuan mahu kelihatan cantik, anggun, dan bergaya....macam-macam gaya direka dan dicipta...tutorial pakai tudung..tak usah cakap laaa....bersepah...aku pon layan je tutorial tudung-tudung ni kadang-kadang...cantik kot diorang...(aku suka tengok perempuan cantik...so what?)

okay..back to the main purpose i wrote this entry...

i went out today...and met this group of girls...bertudung lah mereka... Melayu lah mereka...and bukan hijabista...maksudnya..yg pakai tudung bawal biasa-biasa...tak over-over la lilit-lilit mereka...

sambil makan...sambil usha...aku rasa...tiap 10 saat sekali aku tengok dorang betulkan tudung...kalau tengok..memang tudung dorang tu macam waaaa....terletak kemas habes....terus teringat time sekolah menengah dulu...bila semua orang lilin tudung...yaaaa....gesek lilin kat tudung...lepas tu iron..lepas tu tudung tu terus jadi keras..senang la nak bentuk lepas tu...ok..aku dulu pon lilin je tudung..sape takmo nampak kemas kan??tak pakai deeee plastic-plastic 'controller' kat dalam tudung...tapi kesah lilin dalam hidup aku sekejap je...lepas tu..kembali herot bengot la tudung aku...angin tiup..habis la penyek tudung aku...(kalau lilin...tudung tak gerak hoccay kalo angin tiup...)

kembali kepada kisah kumpulan-kumpulan gadis tadi...sungguh la merimaskan aku...(atau aku yang tak normal?) kejap-kejap betul tudung...kejap-kejap pandang atas...tengok 'awning' tudung... (ye..tudung diorang..lantak diorang...ko tak suka..jangan tengok!!) tapi...duduk depan aku...aku pulak tidak buta..for sure nampak ape diorang buat... -___-''

penat weyh tengok diorang betulkan tudung setiap 10 secs...aku terus terasa...sure diorang tengok aku selebet gila...aku agak confident kalau ada pertandingan siapa bersiap paling cepat..aku boleh menang...
tudung memang stok capai mana sempat...kalo tudung bawal tak beriron..(or memang malas nak iron)..memang aku lilit je ape yang ada and letak kat atas kepala...janji aurat aku tercover...(ha!ko hado?) memang lah concern aku sangat kurang tentang..eyh..kalo ko pakai bawal lagi cantik...or...aku paling nyampah tengok orang pakai tudung lilit melekat kat muka..(kawan-kawan lelaki yang suka cakap gini...ada aku kesah?) tapi aku rasa lagi rimas kalau aku asyik betulkan tudung aku 10secs skali...kan??

belum lagi kisah...OMG...lipstick i dah pudar warnanya lepas makan tadi... #BolehMatiAkuCamni or...kalau tak pakai eyeliner, i takkan keluar rumah...hey please...penat aku...time tulis ni pon dah rasa nak lempang diri sendiri...

tipu kalau aku kata aku tak suka berwajah cantik...tak suka make up stuff...tak pernah beli barang make-up...pernah je..tapi...aku beli...pakai bape kali ntah boleh kira...lepas tu expired...rajin pulak aku nak conteng muka hari-hari...(oke...ayat yang tak sesuai untuk seorang wanita sejati seperti ai...#muntah)

kesimpulannya...sebab diorang betulkan tudung 10secs skali...terus aku jadi annoyed...sebab aku yang rasa tak selesa..walaupon normal and aku rasa mak aku mungkin suka kalau aku jadi gitu....tapi....nanti laaa yeee...aku pakai skirt pon satu perubahan yang aku sangat bangga...hauhauhauhua....aku yang bangga hoccay!!! ko hado? mak aku pon sure bangga...aku tau..dia je tak nak cakap...#perasan...

yang seronok comment suruh aku pakai tudung camni..camtu..pakai ni..pakai tu...kalau korang suka sangat..korang je laaa pakai...tolong la terima muka aku yang tak bermekap ni...dan terima lah juga tudung aku yang sokmo senget-senget ni....

*seriously...kalau fashion police boleh sumbat orang masuk penjara...aku dah lama masuk penjara....mati laaaa....


- E N D -

Sunday, September 9, 2012

worst nightmare had just started

i don't know what should i pray and hope...
i just can't decide...
i can't say yes nor no...

anyway,
time will heal
people will forget

- E N D -

Saturday, September 8, 2012

i am just a normal - not so humble human being

this entry would be long...maybe~

what happened lately?

owh..
i was asked by few people..especially some annoying guy friend who don't understand what is the meaning of friendship and by some of the elders... so...they told me that im old...i shouldn't be picky and bla bla bla... i should get myself a boyfriend...(and some volunteer themselves...which i think WRONG!!! how do i make that statement...i hate you already?) and some even asked me whether i am straight..??!! stop reminding me about me getting old and kertu  and what so ever...why should i marry someone who i already know i can't live with..?? why should i got myself more 'serabut' when it's clear, so far i am fine ALONE...ghentikan la ceramah free korang tu..meluat hoccay...i am seriously not the type of person who will waste my time bercinta sebelum kahwin...and why is that too hard for you to understand??

for God sake...its clear they don't know me well enough...i know they've been worried about me..thank you...but to make everyone clear.. i am still straight...yes.. i do have a lot of gay friend... really good gay friend i must say...and i usually seen travel or had that 'adventure' moment with a girlfriend...(masuk hutan keluar hutan...panjang gunung...facing that near death experience and all that...) and it doesn't make me a lesbian at all... we were both free spirit...none of other friend want/care to join...not even the guy friend...so...why not?? we had that mutual interest..why can't i just give it a go...?? what if i go with a guy friend...???surely a new story will be created...so...i didn't do anything wrong...what is so wrong with me having a girl friend? before this people say bad things about me having too many boy friend... (now..i sound like i desperately want to satisfied others rather than myself...seriously kunang??!!)

and i do have these people who kept pushing me do stuff i hate..like writing an article for them...and force me to sell my painting....seriously..i am not good at both...i made millions grammar mistakes...and when i said i am not interested in selling any of my painting..i really mean it... i do have some UTAS friend who suggest me to sell and make money out of it...that's fine...i appreciate that they see certain quality in my painting...but they're okay with my decision for not selling it... my concern is with these certain people who kept pushing me to sell...seriously..its super annoying... i don't care how much you are willing to pay.. i am just not interested..seriously!

i learned a lot lately...about life especially...about people around me..about people who cares and would never expect any returns..what else can i ask for? all of you are just part of my sweetest memories... sometimes... i  just hope time won't past so we can live the way we are now forever...(i can't imagine Launceston next year..and am afraid to even imagine it...)

about people who cares but with other intention...seriously...they should vanish from this world...pronto!!

i envy them- my friends who are able to do their PP2...and i hope they'll do their best and pass with flying colours...i always wanted to tell them to work hard...and harder...but i know...with my words..they'll end up felt like i've been pressuring them...

i learned that it's normal to become annoyed...but the best way is to not to become one...i mean..the person who had annoyed you... #nauzubillah

and i hope i could write a better entry after this...(less hatred)

what else happened?

owh..all these things below is things that i hope i could erase from my memory...
hatred...and i hope they will stop provoking me too...

i had these(this?) people who kept questioning annoying question at formspring...and thanks to you...i finally realize that i hate people who can never reveal/introduce themselves(or at least make themselves known at  the first place)...so..thats is what formspring is all about eh? anyone can ask random question...? i wouldn't answer any question without a profile after this... it is as annoying as when anonymous commented your entries...and the comments they made were just so bangang i must say...

i am not a celebrity who used to their thousand secret admires...i can't even stand one secret admires... seriously...~ (cakap bajet hot!)

i hate wild gossip...i hate anonymous comment..i hate when people annoyingly keep coming in my life when the only thing i wish is for them to disappear...i hope you find your own happiness and you can stop wishing me bad luck...i didnt do anything..i've warned that i can be ruthless when im annoyed...and yes..some of you annoyed me...life is a complete cycle...karma is a bitch...so...tak perlu la menyumpah sangat...sumpah boleh makan diri bro...

last but not least...live your own life peacefully...tak payah nak sibuk sangat hal orang lain...diri sendiri pon belum bagus lagi...

- E N D -

Monday, September 3, 2012

semak

bila seronok sangat nak bagi nasihat
bila terasa diri tu dah bagus sangat
diri sendiri lupa nak amat

bukan tak mengaku diri sendiri keras kepala
tapi nak jaga tepi kain pun biar lah berpada
kau dah kenal sangat ke aku siapa
setiap kali kau bukak mulut rasa sakitnya telinga
seronok kan berlindung di alam maya?

ye..kau lagi kenal aku siapa...

mungkin kau tak perasan aku tak pernah kisah, kisah hidup kau.

*serkap jarang : annoyed weyh!

- E N D -