nuffnang ads

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

Friday, September 30, 2011

i should stay calm but i couldn't

so...as usual...here is where i randomly write all my complaints about the cruel world....duhhh....
today is DRM day...and guess what? my proposal had been rejected....AGAIN!!!!
i am super worried and like seriously....WORRIED!
the lecturers had drag this to the end..and the victim now are us!
OMG...i have no idea what i should do...what i could do...what the hell is this Design Research Method thingy...??? and i am completely lost....

i cant expect anyone too help me in this...and like seriously...i myself cant help myself because i dont know what i should do and what i could do....

i know i should stay calm to be able to think...but i dont have enough time to stay calm...seriously..i dont even have time to think...but still..i need to spare some time to think...

i need idea...and i need strength....

- E N D -

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

to be better, you should first know how to be one...

this is my laptop screen...cool eh...? my wallpaper..ha ha..

i wonder why i feel so happy today.....
and the reason is......


it's 21 degree today!
alhamdulillah...finally i can feel the heat after the long cold....
this is what i'm trying to show you at the wallpaper...

weather can really change human's behaviour... owh yeah..i read this inspiring entry written by my malaysian friend here in launceston...and like seriously...it is so inspiring..read it here....it is about her view about marriage and about nowadays ways of life..her entry had somehow make me realize how i never care about everything ....

and the best part of her entry is "The better person you become, the better people you attract." So focus on becoming better and Allah willing, we will attract the right kind of person =]

owh..another inspiring blog for today is ska's...she wrote about the power of positive-ness ...aha! (that is  how i interpreted it..hehe... ) she always wrote an inspiring entries...but her entry about parenting had really make me feel that love is what we need..not fear...

FYI...i shouldn't be blogwalking nor blogging since i am going to have a design tute tomorrow....but as usual..the same old kunang...i write when i feel like it...and reading an inspiring stuff can really boost up your idea and positive energy..

hmmm...
it almost to the end...i mean the semester...and i cant wait to have it end...haha...my brain needs break...i think i am almost out of braincell already...i've used too much brain i must say for this semester...my plan for the after semester will change due to what my parents think about it...huuu...(at last...i made my decision...call me anak emak or anak bapak)..i find it hard to argue with them...

i hope that everything will go smooth as planned...i will not lose word during presentation... i have no idea why my english had getting worse since i came here..it is super weird....i find it hard to construct a simple sentence...and to say it out loud..'rasa nak terjun lombong'...(yup..it's Allah's will...He wants me to work harder for sure)...

i pray that He will always there to guide me in everything i do... 

- E N D -

Monday, September 26, 2011

mode jual ikan

hari ini perasaan terasa sedikit kurang rasional...semua yg diperkatakan kedengaran salah di sana sini...semua yang dipamerkan nampak salah di sana sini...duuhhh...

yup...i named this symptom as over sensitive...
mungkin juga diakibatkan oleh rasa tidak selesa pada gigi juga mengundang perasaan2 bangang ni...

sometimes i just want the old me..tak sensitive langsung dgn apa2 yang terjadi..semua orang sakit hati with me without me knowing it...like seriously...memang time tu kurang masalah kat kepala, kurang sakit hati....but the after impact yang tak boleh blah...people cant stand you instead of you cant stand people...and i've been in both situation seriously....and setelah diberi kesedaran oleh Nya setelah like memang dari kecik pon tak sensitive...bila recall2 balik...memang la aku boleh tahan bangang... sorry peeps...memang gua tak perasan...so each time aku nak piss off sgt pon...aku sure akan teringat bahawa aku juga pernah 'tidak berhati'...susah nak kata...mende ni bukan keras hati...tapi more kpd tak peka...tak perasan..bukan malas nak amik pot ye...malas amik pot adalah satu perkara yang berbeza...ni memang tak perasan...so...tahap kesabaran kawan2 yg masih setia hingga ke hari ini memang lah tinggi...yang dpt melihat revolusi dr tiada perasan kepada berperasaan... korg sure paham apa yg aku maksudkan....sesiapa yang pernah menjadi boyfriend...thank you di atas kesabaran tak terduga anda...skarang ni baru aku perasan tang mana aku tak peka...hahaha...

ok end of this part... what ever it is...i m super grateful that Allah gave me this sensitivity... because like seriously...i've met few of 'old me'...and its hard not to hate them...seriously...i dont realize it at first...tp setelah di re-call2...nyata...i've been in that shoe!

mende yang aku btol2 tak blurr sepanjang hidup setakat ni...ialah bab kewangan la kot...bab ni gua tak selamba...memang dari dulu pon gua sentiasa risau bab2 ni... and like seriously..i dont get it when orang berkecil hati bila si pemiutang minta hutang pada si pemiutang or orang yang menggunakan barang orang lain for granted dan upset bila ditegur...berkira jgn ckp la...aku dah berjuta kali kena atas dunia ni...like seriously...i dont mind sharing anything...tapi bila pihak yang habis tu manjang je aku...gua pon jadi tak ikhlas la beb...ape kejadahnye aku membela kau...situation differ ye..!!lepas tu time barang kau seme personal use...barang aku semua kau luakkan..sekali dua gua layan..tapi kalau mcm dah sepanjang perkenalan...gua sentap la jugak...

diharap tiada siapa yang sentap ye! blog ni pon dah mention awal2...place where i write all my complaints about the world! duuuhhh...selain mengingatkan diri sendiri...pembaca juga diharap dpt mengingat diri masing2...yg penting aku ingat..!! aku take note..!! aku kena nampak dulu silap aku before others do...

okey hari ni emosi kurang stabil...kerja dah mula menimbun..masing2 dah mula keluar ayat jual ikan seperti lupa bahawa orang lain juga busy seperti dia, atau mungkin lebih busy daripada..tiada istilah kerja saya lebih penting dari awak atau sebaliknya..maka...tolak ansur lah yang paling utama...yang pasti sebelah pihak sahaja yang bertolak, beransur..memang wont work...maka...let's try hard to make sure everything goes smooth like it should be...

sangat suka design2 lembu di tempat cheese semalam...!!


dunia ini dipinjamkan utk semua...maka mari lah kita menjaga isinya bersama2!

terharu membaca expression, caption, dan luah hati gembira rakan2 yang terlibat semalam....
yes. we had so much fun together yesterday...it was seriously fun and memorable!!

*i m just like other normal human being...sabar saya sentiasa ada limitnya...ikhlas saya juga ada batasannya..

- E N D -

Sunday, September 25, 2011

bersyukur dengan nikmat Nya


hmmm...bunyi title mcm hari ni je bersyukur...-__-

*kita harus sentiasa bersyukur...walau diberi musibah sekali pun, kerana musibah itu tanda Dia sayangkan kita* (",)

today is the day we agree to pick as our last day for berfoya-foya for this sem, insyaAllah...as the upcoming weeks will be hectic as hell...so we decided to 'immune' ourselves with 'kebahagiaan yg tak terhingga' before the weeks come..T_T..pathetic gila!

so...overall...todays vacation was great!! all were in moderation i must say..no exaggeration...everyone behave and enjoy the day...our original plan is only to go to the tulip farm...but it ends up...tulip farm...light house...cherry shed...chocolate museum..cheese shed..and andy's gelato makan eskrem sedap...picnic pagi kat burnie tepi pantai...picnic ptg tak igt nama tempat...tp best sbb solat semua skali kat situ...makanan sedap2...cuaca alhamdulillah elok...alhamdulillah...

kesimpulannya...our journey in experiencing His greatness through all the great nature we saw today was awesome...subhanallah...semua mende nampak indah...walaupon kalau ikut2 kan picnic petang tadi ialah di tepi longkang..haha...tapi seronok!

saya suka picnic ringan2 gini..semua last minute plan..tapi semua happy...i'm happy..happy to see everyone's happy..and everyone seems happy to see everyone's happiness...

so...with all this happiness He grants us today..I hope...we will be tough enough...to face the upcoming hectic weeks...all the best to all of us...






some of today's pics...sangat suka design lembu itu!

*thanks Allah for this great day!

- E N D -

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

insyaAllah

segala yang terjadi ade perancangan..

apa yang terjadi hari ini akan ada rancagan untuk di kemudian harinya...
tinggal nak putuskan sahaja...bagaimana caranya? do it in your own way...asalkan masih ada pertimbangan untuk kebaikan manusia sejagat...

peringatan untuk diri sendiri terutamanya...dan for the readers...
kegembiraan dunia itu hanya pinjaman sementara dari Allah
ujian itu merupakan tanda kasih sayang Allah
hatta mimpi dalam tidur juga dari Allah

sekiranya Allah mahukan ianya jadi...maka jadi lah ia...

usaha + doa + tawakal...

**Ya Allah...jauhkan aku dari bisikan syaitan...

- E N D -

Sunday, September 18, 2011

logic and reality

after dah bape hari blog ni di-auto publishkan..maka...hari ini...blog akan ditulis live and fresh.....
baca2 balik...mcm silap je rentetan blog gua...tp baca2 balik kali kedua...boley thn arr prediction gua last few days...

so seperti biasa....saat ini patutnya buat BTD...tp buang masa sat!!!

alhamdulillah....yesterday was awesome...being in new environment...new circle of friends...and being with different people taught me a lot of things...kurang sikit rasa sedih....

penat..but alhamdulillah...it was awesome...never know that being with new people can be this awesome..

i had a long chat with some old friends yesterday...and like what other normal old buddies will do...we will talk about us..gossip2 sket....update sikit2...so smpai satu part yg tetiba termasuk ke arah2 tazkirah gitu...which I think was good but never thought it would happen among us..haha...tetiba ada part2 motivasi...ada part2 good old days reminiscent.. FYI they werent my best friend during those day..and still not...for arguement sake...the meaning of friend itself is hugely personal....and we are happy it happened that way...

my friend quoted this,
"I have some friends I never see who live miles away. We were best friends in college but now we call each other only when we have good news or when we're unhappy or just need to reconnect. Neither the distance nor the years seem to matter, we can start right up where we left off, when there is no other way good friends should be heard if they can't be seen."

hmmm...thats what normally happened...like seriously...i m grateful to be friend to whoever had had me as friend in their heart..present and past...i've faced a lot of hard time with my friends...gadoh..backstabbed stuff..'curang'...anak manja..tipikal anak orang kaya....biadap..tak sedar diri...bla..bla...bla...and that make us know ourself better....everyone deserve a good friend or a bunch of good friends. Theres no term of me having a cooler friend than you...or your friends are better than mine...whatever perception we had about others is totally different  to be compared...some might think my friends are just so uncool...but deep in my heart...those uncool friend is just another normal cool human being in my heart and who are you to judge em?

owh...i m super sensitive when something bad happened to my friend...or when you talk bad things about my friend...like seriously..if others had did the same things to you...i'll get pissed offf too...and some of these friends dont even know how much i cared sometimes...just like i shockingly know that theres actually bunch of friends who really care about me...but as usual..i failed to see things....i see only what i choose to see...not see things that i should see.... thanks guys for being really nice...only Allah can repay you for all the good deeds....insyaAllah..

and like what A said yesterday..."hidup tak susah pon...yg buat susah bila masing2 nak jadi best..time ko rasa ko lagi best...time tu la sebenarnye kau hilang diri kau..."semua senyap...A ialah manusia yg annoying, mulut longkang tapi berjiwa sensitif..aha!(sila jgn maki aku kalo ko baca ni)...one thing good about A is A will always confront everything..dia la pelopor.."yg kau menggelupur pedas tu kenapa kalo tak makan cili..."...like seriously..betul sangat...and yg lain2 hanya mampu senyap...including me... yes...mulut longkang can be good sometimes...

and W said : when you think Allah had actually granted you with what you've prayed/wish for...think again...is it for your good or He is just trying to test you...? W...you always the softest one...yup...agree with W...like what i always said...what is wrong is never completely wrong...and what is right is never completely right...what you think is good is not 100% good... W...u r always the sweetest..jarang2 cakap...skali cakap mmg terbaik!!

so what define everything is always base on how you wanted it to be defined...family..friends...personal space..happiness...stress...and etc...and what all of us had agree yesterday was...'biar and lihat...tindakan kadang2 tak perlu pun...biar saja mereka gembira dengan diri mereka... tapi...di ingat pula oleh W..."hati kita Allah bagi untuk kita jaga..tapi jangan pula disakiti hati orang lain demi menjaga hati sendiri...paham..perbaiki diri...baru be better....bila kita skip proses perbaiki diri tu..tu yang kita lupa..Allah pinjamkan dunia ni kat KITA semua...bukan kita sorang"(lps tu keluar mcm2 lagi nasihat2 bernas)..haih la W...may Allah bless you always...bila berckp tu sejuk je dgr...we need more people like you on this planet...

so dalam proses meneutralkan diri...walaupon susah...i'll try...whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger kunang...
May Allah leads me along the way towards it...



**yg lain2 tu..it doesn't mean what you said are not important...at this moment..i prefer to keep it to myself...no heart feelings..nnt gua sambung lagi tulis...

- E N D -

Saturday, September 17, 2011

erti yang tiada erti

resah, gelisah, menyampah,
mampukah tak endah?

telinga masih boleh mendengar
mata masih mampu mengesan sinar
hati makin pudar
adakah itu tanda aku perlu sedar?
atau sudah mulai sedar?

siapa kau?
apakah kau?
di mana kah kau?
mengapa kau?

aku biasa melihat perkara tipikal
tapi belum mampu melalui kehidupan tipikal
apatah lagi mengharunginya dengan insan tipikal

ini bukan lagi fikiran
ini bukan lagi rintihan
tapi ini sudah jadi kejian


kau?



**oh ya..kau ada hati yang perlu dijaga....

- E N D -

Friday, September 16, 2011

i am living another typical archy life

i am facing a really hard time now...theres 5 weeks to go..and im all lost...i hate it when i did good at the beginning and end up like a loser towards the end...

to be honest...i am grateful despite all the craziness that happened lately...it make me feel more ambitious in certain way..and the will to strive for the best had gone to 200% i must say...

to be here...where you are the 'alien' of the place..never been easy...its harder when you are muslim and a woman..people look at you differently...people understand you differently...and sometimes they see you like you're the cause of a disease...it is emotionally challenging especially when you feel like people chose to be racist rather than professional...well...its not what we feel...its what we realize...and as usual, they'll deny it....
okay..enough about people..

let's talk about me!

this week had been a disaster....like seriously..things dont always happen as you want it...when you think you are actually in the right track..and all the responses you receive from the lecturers were positive...you'll start to feel more at ease...and got super-shock with the result for the work you've done...thats what happen to me...i receive a very good responses indeed..i did super well at the beginning..and today..to receive a lower result than before and lower than i hope it to be had somehow made me feel down...this is when you are emotionally tested...you have to put away all the negative thought immediately and move forward...when tense is your motivator...you can do something that beyond your ability...so...with a lot of effort...doa..and tawakal...i really hope i could do better...be the best....and make people who love me proud...

i'll try my best to beat my emotion when difficulties come...and rationally re-strategizing the next step...

work hard..think smart..live life...and believe in Allah as he would never fails to love you... 

**when you are just average..there are still hundred reasons to fail you...so be the best..make failure seems impossible....(lebih kurg gitu la kata2 Pn.Nakiah kat i dulu...)

enjoy the video...this is what i feel...what i've experience..and what i would say out loud if i am given the chance to say it...yes..i am living another typical archi student life...!!






- E N D -

Thursday, September 15, 2011

hari stress ai...yu ade hari stress? ha!

so...as usual...what you saw is not always what you get...
kunang...after this saturday..no more bersuka ria for you..now that you get the chance to have an equal time like others mean that you could do better than others...BETTER...

lift up your chin...think critically...do what you have to do...struggle like theres no more tomoro..and doa and tawakal for all the effort...

insyaAllah...He will always give what you deserve...

**super anxious for tomoro's DRM....i can go 'gila' if this happens everyday....

- E N D -

happy birthday aisyah mokhtar

so...its 15th sept...and its my housemate's birthday! she is going to have her presentation jap lagi..and i hope she will be doing great on her birthday..my best wishes also goes to my other housemate,nisha, who will also be presenting tomorrow.

to wake up this early...i am suppose to study but end up procrastinate...had a weird dream last night..and had googled for its meaning..and i should be extra careful...may Allah will always protect me from anything that is not good...

i will surely write again tomorrow after my session with the lecturer...tomorrow i will get the feedback for my last task for DS8...and like seriously...i am super anxious to know the result...hope that im doing good and fine...

wish me luck!
to aisyah & nisha...
good luck for today!

- E N D -

Sunday, September 11, 2011

positive is not my bestfriend at this moment

nothing much to say....

i should be struggling doing DRM and BTD...but end up procrastinating like hell...
and mengada2 tacing2...
blah ah kau !
cakap tak serupa bikin...

orang lain pon pandai jual ikan!

I is the most selfish word I ever found in the dictionary...
and we sometimes forget that we live in 'we'...
aha!

**menyampah dengan semua benda...duuhhh...
masing-masing mahu menjadi malaikat...aku tak heran...

- E N D -

Saturday, September 10, 2011

afraid??

i just finished watching muallaf...yes it is not a new movie, but only today i got the chance to watch it.

i should be writing a report for my DRM artefact...hmmm...

being here in Australia, or specifically, Launceston, Tasmania, make me think, a lot.about so many stuff...
in Malaysia, I am one of thousand book lovers who read almost everything.... i have  friends that i think have this mutual interest. nana and ska.we read everything, we love everything, we hate everything, we argue about everything, we support whoever we think is right, and our openness about thing that happened around us is definly different compared to my other friend..... girls..like seriously i miss you girls..and each time there's an issue happened here especially in my DRM class...i wish you were here with me...as both of you are better with words....

i will randomly judge people in this entry...i dont have problems with other races nor relligion. yes i am a Muslim..and i practise Islam...

honestly, i've been in both situation...with hijab and without hijab...my heights and my skin colour make me look different. i dont really look like other typical malay although i am the real malay. i've been in the situation where people simply judge me as 'wild girl' and in situation where recently i was called  as uncivilized people just because im wearing hijab in this country. being judged and judging is 2 complete different thing. being the judges doesnt make you any better. but being the one who is judged, proof who you are.

i posted what had happen to me recently where theres a group of guy...(how i wish i could call them a bunch of fools...but that just so not me...) insulted me in a public space...lucky they just say bad words and there is no any body contact at all....but it makes me think....what make people do such thing? i mean the insult part....

like seriously...i dont really judge people what they are...but more to who they are...

i dont understand when people see islam as a terrorist...muslim woman as a threat, ninjas or whatever you named us...i just dont understand...i wonder what will happen if you're in my shoe...

people blindly define what is freedom...what is civilisation...they easily get upset, they narrow down their mind...they think what they want to think...they chose who they want to respect without thinking, and they randomly assume others as 'the fools' and unlucky...

think..think..think...what make you different...assuming is never the right thing to do... confronting is different to general announcement... i found that it is hard for people to confront others when they have problems... they prefer to assume that the other individual can never accept about what they going to say...so as a result..they tell others and misconception happens..owh..and theres some who tried to be honest..but at the same time humiliate the other party because of it...and that is not confronting...that is humiliating...find ways guys...!!!



read and interpret...
honestly...i have no problem at all people saying stuff towards me..as long as theres no body contact...yup its true like ska used to say to me once...Kuna...u kan selalu dont give a damn about what people say...so why bother...??

she's right...stuff like this wont never get me down...i pity them for behaving such way...

people are afraid with stuff they dont understand / know...

**i didnt post it to make you angry, feel offended nor feel threaten...i want you to think..!!



- E N D -

Friday, September 9, 2011

untuk peringatan

setelah dikurniakan Allah pelbagai nikmat...mungkin ini lah harinya sedikit peringatan darinya agar jgn lalai dan mudah berpuas hati....Alhamdulillah...kurniaan Allah sem ni mencurah2...more than i can ever imagine...like seriously...

hari ini diingatkan tentang dalam satu2 mende2 yang smooth...pasti akan ade rintangan2 yg perlu ditangani...
dlm hidup yg smooth pasti ade manusia2 yg rs mereka betul kerana mereka percaya faktor umur mereka membuatkan merela lebih tahu tanpa mengira perasaan si muda....
dlm hidup yg smooth Allah nak kita fikir kalo ape yg kita kna ni jangan la dibuat kepada orang lain pula hendaknya....
dlm hidup yg smooth Allah nak kita igt dan belajar dengan apa yg jadi di sekeliling kita...yg baik jadikan pengajaran..yg buruk jadikan sempadan...
dlm hidup kita yg smooth...dia nak kita terus meminta kepadanya...serta bersyukur dengan nikmat, hidayah, kemudahan, dan semua atau apa jua jenis nikmat dunia ni...

oke..itu sahaja pengajaran yg saya dapat untuk hari ini sahaja...hari2 lain..tadak tulis aaa....

**biadap adalah satu tingkah laku yg dipilih...dan saya kurang berminat dengan pilihan itu...

- E N D -

Friday, September 2, 2011

kegagalan yg hish...

rupanya tak semudah yg disangka
contour di rhino gagal dilaksana
ampun ampun ampun
udah 2 hari pusing2
tak jadi2 bikin hati runsing

malas gila nak balik ke bumi kangaroo
malas nak mengadap dunia sana yang haru biru

**mood sem ini tamat di sini sahaja
*selain diri sendiri...saya salahkan kamu...

- E N D -

Thursday, September 1, 2011

masih belum terubat...

this entry will show you the other side of me..
ye...ni I la yang tules...aku ni...

bunyi title nak jiwang...hahaha...

kepada kawan-kawan saya di luar sana....heed my word...kawan!!

saya ni sensitif orangnye...sungguh pon selalu disalah ertikan tiang..tunggul...batu...human being that never give a damn about anything... dan lain2 lagi...saya yakin saya adalah manusia normal yang typical...

sungguh pon selalu disalah 'judgement-kan' oleh manusia sekeliling...saya dah biasa..ye saya redha...bukan tidak kisah..cuma..ianya hak anda untuk menilai...tapi siapa anda? saya juga masih dalam proses mengenali diri sendiri...bagaimana pula anda lebih pasti siapa saya?

cuma kadang-kadang saya terfikir...susah sangat ke nak bersangka baik untuk orang lain?
susah sangat ke nak bercakap baik tentang orang lain...

ingat...
yang betul belum tentu betul
yang salah belum tentu salah

tulisan saya memang condong ke kiri...tapi itu tak bermakna apa2...saya sentiasa mengenang kisah lalu walaupun saya lebih suka fikir ape yang bakal jadi....

bila jadi begini...saya akan selalu ingatkan diri saya...

Allah gives me what I need..not what I want...

saya dah penat bersabar...
mungkin dah sampai masa saya mengundur diri...
benarlah kata manusia-manusia typical...
jangan berharap sangat pada kelainan...

kepada diri sediri

situasi ini sama seperti yang lepas..
apa yang perit sangat?
situasinya sama..
key player nya juga lebih kurang sama
umur, status, style, background...bla..bla..bla...
impact nya juga hampir2 sama
what surprised me...

ayat nya juga sama!!

rasa peritnya juga hampir sama...

apakah yang hendak ditunjukkan oleh Mu ya Allah?

saya tak tahu apa yang awak cuba sampaikan..
kalo awak nak delete saya dari hidup awak..
saya sedia di delete kan..
tapi tak perlu buat statement yang buat saya rasa bersalah jadi part of ur life

saya takkan pernah serik dalam berkawan...
dan saya lebih suka our good old days dari hari sekarang yang kelat..

yes..awak tahu siapa sayang awak...bagus laaa...
saya masih sayang awak after what had happened...
saya? saya masih belum sure siapa sayang saya...yang saya pasti...saya dah silap...
awak tak pernah sayang saya...



*terguris
**pftt..ayat tak bleh blah...

- E N D -